Only You (Sequel to Good Enough)

11

Jade **One Month Later**

It has been a month since Perrie filed for a divorce. I barely know what to do with myself anymore. I have a decent apartment in Los Angeles as I couldn't bear to be in the same country as her.

Everything reminds me of Perrie. I can't believe that I fucked up our marriage. I truly had everything and now I have nothing.

I have been staying out of the media's way and barely going out. There are too many blondes in Los Angeles for my liking. I get excited every time hoping it is Perrie looking for me, but it's not.

I have barely spoken to anyone since I made the move to L.A. Jesy pretty much took Perrie's side of events which I would've as well.

I sometimes talk to Leigh-Anne as she's pretty much the only person to give me updates on Perrie. She told me that she personally apologized to Perrie and that Perrie somewhat forgave her.

I still keep all of our old photos together and constantly look at them. I can only hope that she's doing better than me.

I am a complete mess without her. I can barely get motivation to get out of bed in the morning. Most of my days are spent staring out the window or looking at photos of Perrie.

I occasionally post on social media so that my fans aren't worried about me. I secretly stalk Perrie's social media to try and see how she is doing. Although we are technically divorced, I still love her with my entire heart. I still love her and dream of her in my arms every night.

I respect her decision, but I can't help but miss every little thing about her. It was my fault. I should've treated her better and shown her the way I felt. I can only express that in writing now. I always write her letters, but I never mail them.

I have about five or six letters sitting on my dresser waiting to be sent. I would probably never have the courage to send them to her.

I sigh and take out my phone to try and talk to Jesy. Jesy is the only person that will sometimes talk to me that has real updates on Perrie.

"Hello." Jesy's voice chimes through the line. I was shocked that she actually answered. "Hey. It's um Jade." I say to her.

"How's L.A?" She asks me just trying to make small talk. "It's fine. How's Perrie?" I ask her trying to desperately find out how the blonde is doing.

"Well. She's finally able to look at Leigh-Anne without crying. I set her up on a date a few nights ago, but she didn't appear to have a good time." Jesy tells me. My heart breaks when I find out that she ended up going on a date.

"A-A date?" I ask Jesy. "Mhm. I mean she's a single woman and so are you. It's time you both moved on." Jesy tells me.

"I don't think I'll be able to." I tell Jesy in a serious tone as I'm not looking to date anyone but Perrie.

"Jade listen to me. What you had is over. Perrie is moving on and I suggest you move on as well so you don't end up hurt." Jesy tells me as if she's giving me advice. I shake off the advice as I really don't care.

"No Jesy. I vowed to Perrie that I wouldn't love anyone else. And it's true. I don't love anyone except her. I pray everyday that she will come back to me Jesy and I'm happy living in that fantasy." I tell her angrily.

"Well Jade. I'm just trying to be realistic here." She tells me. I don't care about being realistic anymore. "Do you think Perrie would want to talk to me?" I ask Jesy.

"No Jade. And please next time you call me don't ask about her." Jesy tells me before hanging up. I can tell that she is still bitter about the fact that I cheated.