Of course I knew. It didn't make it any easier, though. Funny isn't it? What the brain does to protect your heart, your sanity.
I'd blotted the event from my memory completely. It became a daydream, a fantasy. Did it really happen or was it just the beginnings of a story? One that will forever be lost in the fog of my imagination because I couldn't express the thoughts well enough to make the words appear on the page.
No. I remember. Everything. It was the look in his eyes that triggered it. He was pleading with me. Then he actually said the words, "Help me mummy. It hurts. I'm scared."
Oh, God. How could she do that to me? My son was having his appendix removed. I still have my appendix but when I was nine, I was on my way to losing my liver.
"Munchausen's by Proxy." I'm not even sure if it's even considered a thing anymore. The so called experts can't agree if it's real or not. Child abusers have gotten out of gaol because a group of head shrinkers couldn't agree on what to label the abuse. Mum drugged me.
Perhaps it would have been easier to remain lost in the fog.
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