I Found My Happines With Him...(n.h)

Chapter 37~(Edited)

Listen to Where Do Broken Hearts Go by One Direction

~Niall's POV~

I have to do it.

I fucking have no way out. If I don't they'll harm her and my family. I couldn't contain the blame, if something happened to them. I just couldn't.

I know I'll be harming her, giving her pain. But for her own safety I have to do this. I know. I'm a coward. A fucking coward who can't stand up for his love ones.

A coward who's giving into something he doesn't want to. Sighing I looked at her sitting on the couch Indian style like she always does when she's over.

She sat reading a new book, she picked it up on when we had gone out together. The lads and girls were out, I couldn't do this in front of them.

I couldn't, they know me to well that they'd know something is going on. She sat reading intently. Fingers grasping it tight, flipping the page once she finished reading the page.

Going on to the next, and she repeated the cycle. The mere thought of her meeting Andrew the day we went out, had frightened me to no end. Just like how he told me to end it with her, yesterday. I couldn't, I just couldn't. I liked her, a lot.

Exhaling it was now or never and in this situation I preferred never. Walking towards her I stood a few inches away from the couch armrest.

"Hey. Ni." She said looking up at me with that damn beautiful smile of hers. A smile that made my heart thump against my chest.

A smile that I wouldn't be able to see anymore. A smile that I will miss every second of the day. A smile that brightens up my day and I won't be able to see it.

"When were you planning on telling me?" I asked my eyes never leaving hers.

"I'm sorry. What's going on Niall?" She asked eyes glistening.

"You know what's fucking going on. Don't play dumb with me." She flinched at the vulgar language coming out of my mouth.

"I'm sorry. Is this about.. I'm sorry, I didn't tell you about your stepbrother.. It's just I didn't know how-" she began but I interrupted her.

"I don't need to hear what you have to say." I said shaking my head.

"Please. Niall don't do this not now." She said with pleading eyes.

"How can you say that? When! When were you going to tell me? Tomorrow, next week, next month or what next year! When!" I now raising my voice is wrong, but I have to do this. All I can think of is her safety.

"I was going to tell you! I just didn't know how to bring it up." She spoke her voice shaking at the end.

"Did you just hear that. You were. So you weren't planning then before. Huh." I said snickering at the end, I have to make this more believable.

"Stop! Stop.." She turned around away from me, I could see her shoulder shaking.

She was crying, and it was all my fault. It took every ounce in me not to go up to her and pull her into my chest and say that this was all a lie. That I didn't care if she didn't told me about Andrew.

"When are you planning on telling me what's been bothering you." She said with her back to me still. Until she turned around and looked at me with puffy eyes.

Stiffening up, it pained me to see her like this. Sighing I turned around not able to look at her watery eyes, because with one more glance I was done. I wouldn't be able to end it.

"Today! But now, I don't think I can. Not with you telling me all this. How am I suppose to trust you?" My face was placed on my hands not being able to contain the tears that were flowing down my cheeks.

"Like how you've always done. Or wait you didn't even trust me then, did you? Such a hypocrite." She said chuckling. "Oh how stupid of me. Why would I think you were any different then all of them. You are just like the others."

"No, I didn't and how happy I am I didn't. Who knows what you could've done." I spoke still back to her.

"Nothing. I couldn't harm you. You mean everything to me. Just-just answer me with the truth, it's all I'm asking. But look at me when you say it." She said touching my shoulder flinching at the sudden gesture.

I turned around and saw her take a step back. "You don't even like me, like you've been saying all this time do you? You only did this out of pity, you pitied me, didn't you?" She said. I didn't utter a word, she searched my eyes looking for any sign of contradicting my quietness.

"Glass is sensitive, fragile, easy to brake, you have to be gentle, careful with it but if you drop it, it shatters into pieces.

"Large, medium, small pieces, you might be able to find them but those pieces you can't put back together. Because once broken, you can't fix them.

And my heart right now are all those little glass pieces." She spoke with tears flowing down her rosy cheeks.

Sighing she grabbed her sweater that was placed were she was sitting. Walked towards the door put on her shoes and opened the door. But before her slim figure disappeared she spoke behind her shoulder.

"I'm not sure who you are, but I know your not the Niall I know nor the Niall I-I fell in love with." And with that she left her figure nowhere insight. She left, leaving me stunned.

She loves me. And I had messed up bad, but I knew I did the best. At least that's what my mind told me but my heart and mind have different feelings. And right now my heart was aching in pain, pain that will be hard to recreate.

Walking to my room, grabbing my guitar. I sat in front of my window, looking out at the peaceful night sky. The moon gleaming with it's bright light down the city. Strumming a few cords, I begin playing a song that I was now familiar to.

(A\N:Listen to 18 by One Direction)

"I got a heart and I got a soul
Believe me I will use them both.
We made a start
Be it a false one, I know
Baby, I don't want to feel alone"

With every word I sang, my heart ached with a more furious pain. What had I done?

"We took a chance
God know we tried
Yet all along, I knew we'd be fine"

This time I couldn't stop the tears from flowing down my cheeks, I couldn't stop them and I wouldn't.

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A\N: Update. Yay! Thank you for the 2k reads! Your all so wonderful. No joke you guys are. Next chapter will be in Steph's POV....I hope. If it's not I apologize beforehand.

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