Catalyst

XXIV

They put her in what Camila recognizes as the same cell Lauren was in a couple weeks ago. It looks just like every other cell, but being in here gives Camila a strange sense of comfort, despite the circumstances.

It feels a lot tighter than she would have imagined. Every time she looks around she feels like the walls are getting closer, if only by a few inches. She takes a seat on the metal slab they call a bed and stares at the door.

She wonders how long they'll keep her in here for harboring a knife. She knows Frangipane set her up, but did she work alone? Perhaps this was to get back at her for all the cigarettes she stole and gave to Lauren. But she had been very careful since Frangipane first got suspicious... she thought she hadn't noticed.

(It's important to note that Lauren didn't need Camila to steal for her; she had informed Camila she had someone who could get them to her. But Camila stole Frangipane's cigarettes solely because she hates her guts, and it was a way she could sneakily get back at her for all the annoying shit she pulls.)

Maybe Frangipane had been counting them. Camila had noticed them in a different spot every time she went for them. Frangipane didn't appear to be very good at hiding, though. She supposes that's how she ended up here in the first place.

Camila leans her back against the wall of her cell. It sends a shiver down her spine, but she stays put. She tries to imagine how Lauren must have felt in here. Lauren, her savior, who is no doubt working at finding out exactly what happened. The thought of her keeps Camila from letting the tears slip past.

She feels incredibly calm. She supposes it may be nice to get away from Frangipane for a few nights. But that's only one positive compared to all of the other negatives. She hopes they feed her. She's always been too scared to ask Ally or Lauren much about it.

A conversation her and Ally had weeks ago pops into her head now. Ally had returned from another SHU visit the night before. Camila was starting to think Ally actually liked it down here.

"Can I ask you something, Ally?" Camila leans forward at breakfast. The only other person listening is Lauren, who is eating her eggs quietly. Camila waits for Ally to give an affirmative nod before asking, "How are you so calm? I mean... how do you spend so much time in that... that hellhole and then..."

"They're just walls," Ally tells her honestly, "And I like the quiet. Seclusion is my nirvana. Being alone is what's best for me when I have an... episode," Camila has never seen Ally had an 'episode', unless you count the countless times she has faked crazy behavior to get other inmates to leave her alone. She wonders what Ally considers an 'episode', "It doesn't work for everyone, but it works for me."

Camila knew that "everyone" had meant Lauren. She thinks Lauren understood, too. But neither of them had asked anything more after that. Ally changed the topic. For someone who seemed so zen about coming down here, she sure had acted quickly to steer away from the topic. Now that she thinks about it, though, maybe that had been for Lauren. Not for herself.

They're just walls, echoes in Camila's head.

Walls covered in dirt and grime. This place looks like it would contaminate any cleaning supplies that tried to come near it. There are stains on the wall. Camila notes that there's a bit of a smell, but it's mostly too cold for her to pick up much. She has a bucket to pee, at least.

Camila lays down. She closes her eyes. She tries to imagine Lauren beside her.

They're just walls.

-

On the second day, the warden comes to question her. She tries to tell him it wasn't her, but he says that they've found no proof to back up her claim on the security tapes. Her prints are the only ones on the knife. Camila wonders how Frangipane managed to pull that off.