Kissing in the mist.

Chapter 7

I pushed him away, I didn't like louis like that.

"Goodnight louis." I say kissing his cheek and walking away with sadness in my eyes.

"Goodnight love." I slammed my door shut as those words escaped his mouth.

I was tossing and turning.

How could louis like me like that? He had a girlfriend, what happened to her? How could he like.. 'No stop. Not again..'I told myself but something inside me kept going,

how could someone like him, like someone as horrible as you! ha you're a fool for think you had a chance with Zayn, but now louis! You're too pathetic, look at yourself! Your scars that run up and down your arms and legs, you aren't nothing but a fat piece of meat. A fucking, lowlife, loser who doesn't deserve anyone! Maybe lose a few pounds an-.

"Stop!!" I scream, not realizing what I was doing.

I had tears running down my face and I was shaking. I haven't done that in forever, how I hated the monster that loved to eat on my pain. The last time he showed up and ate on me was when my mom left me at home by myself to run away with her boyfriend, I was only 15.. 15.

Luckily I found out who my biological father was and he took me in and care for me.

It was only a few seconds after my plead for help when louis ran into my room.

"Haven! what's wrong? Are you okay?" He said turning on my lights and walking towards me.

Was I okay? Was I ever going to be okay.

"Yeah I'm fine louis. I'm just overthinking everything." I huff, maybe I'm just stressed out with the harry thing that just happened, Zayn punching louis, louis trying to kiss me.

Honestly ever since Zayn had walked into my life, he turned it upside down. Not in a bad way, but not in a good way either. I'm trying so hard to forget what louis tried to do because I've liked him since we were growing up, but then I stopped when Harry came along & now Zayn. All I've ever wanted was here standing right in front of me, but he was no longer in that position in my heart.

"I understand, Haven. Earlier it was a mistake, I honestly don't like you like that. I guess jealousy washed over me, so that's why I did it." He says laying next to me pulling me closer.

"Okay good Louis, because I can't like you right now when Zayn is the only thing on my mind." I huff.

The way he could be so angry and demanding to being caring is crazy.

"Louis, I think I should get some sleep. Can you turn off the light?" I say getting comfortable.

"Sure thing love." He moves to turn them off then comes back to lay next to me.

Louis was like a brother to me, he could make all the pain go away with one hug. He is the closest thing I have to a real family.

Waves of pain would try and drown me, but he was my lifesaver. Every time the darkness seemed to be winning, louis was my light to help me find my way home.

"Goodnight Lou."

"Night Haven."

With those few words, it felt okay again and that everything would turn out fine.
---

I slowly opened my eyes to see my room was empty.

The beautiful sun hitting my bed, peeking through my window. The sound of birds and animals, only to bring me closer to peace.

Suddenly I smell the amazing aroma of coffee filling the air.

I close my eyes in hopes of drifting back to sleep, I'm not ready yet.

I'm not ready to face the world, to face Louis, Harry, or even Zayn.

As I start to fall asleep again, I hear the sound of a phone.

My phone.

Before checking the phone number, I pick up.

"Hello??" I say with my morning voice, I honestly wish I was still asleep.

"Haven?" Someone says quietly, a female.

"Yeah? Who is this?"

"Susan.. It's me sweetie. it's mommy." She said

The world suddenly felt like it was on fire and I had no clue what to do. My mind was screaming 'I hate you!' But my heart couldn't help but be happy to hear her voice once more. The world was on crashing down and all I could do was try to breath. The air was becoming thin and it felt like my lungs weren't working. I didn't have a clue what to say.

"love what's wrong?" I heard Louis say, I turn around to let him see my face.

"Mom?" I say looking Louis in the eye, he understood what I was scared about now.

"I miss you, we have a lot of catching up to do! Why don't you stop by my place today at 5, my address is 37-."

"Why? How?"

"Oh haven. I missed seeing my daughter, I've been looking for you for the last 2 years. I regret ever leaving you."

"How did you get my number Susan?" She was playing a game she didn't wanna play.

"I got it from Karen, I saw her walking to the library and stop to talk to her. She didn't say a lot. She only gave me your number."

Louis is now sitting next to me holding me, I had my mom on speaker. Everything that left her mouth felt like a lie. Why now, why after 5 years does she care.

"I don't live in Chicago anymore. I left the first chance I had, because of the horrible memories you caused." I said and hung up.

She can't do that, she can't come back into my life after what she did to me. Letting her boyfriend leave me in bruises, and Her leaving cuts on my heart. I didn't choose to be so protective of who I am, I don't mean to keep everything to myself. It's my defense system, so I never get hurt like that again.

And even after everything that just happened the only thing I can't say is.

"What time is it."

I check the time to see its 1:27.

"Louis why didn't you wake me up earlier!!" I say throwing a pillow at him.

"Why would I?"

"I work at 2:30 & I have a date tonight." I say smiling at myself.

{{ okay okay this is a shitty chapter but I hope you guys like it! & the picture I tagged is Zoe!! Super sweet gal, and everything I said in this chapter ISNT true about her or anyone! No matter how hard it gets, never start to think like that!! <3

If you wanna see more about Zoe, follow her Instagram

zxemiller

Love you guys!!

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-xx }}