SANA

23

Well i'm still here, can't sleep. Thinking about what happened earlier. Thinking why the hell it still fucking hurts. Kakaisip ng mga bagay bagay di ko namalayan na nakatulog na pala ko.

I woke up at 9am, walang kagana gana sa lahat. I'm so tired of everything, i'm so fucked up and i wanna cry all day, lol.

Oh! Brent's calling me.

INCOMING CALL "BRENTYPOGI🤙"

yea sa sobrang pag fifeeling nya pinaltan nya na ng ganyan yan.

so i answered it.

"Yes?"

"Ay sunget!" Brent said

"Gago ano nga, i was sleeping kase!" I answered

"Come to the restau here near the pool area, everyone's here including him"

"La ko gana"

"Stop dayne, di ka ganyan ha. Bilisan mo na magtatampo sayo tong mga to."

"Fine, wait"

After 15 mins nakita ko silang lahat. Yes, LAHAT. whoa.

Everyone was happy eating. Ako naman tahimik lang, wala munang pake sa mundo. I don't even know why am i like this, e bff lang naman kami diba? HAYS.

Nagsinungaling ako sa sarili ko.

I am done eating and i tell them na i will go back to our room coz i'm not feeling well. Then andrei insisted na ihatid nya ko baka mapano daw ako. And i tell him na wag na kasi kaya ko na.

I came back to our room safely, yes our room. Me and Ricci's room. I made my desicion, i will go back to manila just to fix my things. And will go back to NY. Kung saan ako nararapat talaga.

I heard the door opened.

I saw him.

Awkward dude.

I was fixing my maleta puting my clothes and things inside.

"U going back to manila?"

"Uh? Ye-a" I answered

"Why?"

"I'm gonna fix my things lang don then i will go back to NY na."

"Why? Because of me?"

"Because of u? What do u mean?"

"Kasi nasasaktan ka, padin?"

"No rivero."

"U're not good at hiding dayne paola."

"Rivero."

"What? Pagusapan natin. Sige." Ricci said

"Anong pagusapan? Tapos na naman diba ayos na" I said

"Mahal mo pa ko?" He asked

"What the hell ricci?!" I said

"Just answer my fucking question!" He shouted

"No!"

"Then why r u acting like that?!"

"WALA!"

so intense.

"Tell me now, ano?!"

"Mahal mo pa ba ko?" he added.

"Tell me dayne!"

"Answer me!"

"OO RICCI OO!! I STILL FUCKING LOVING U AND IT STILL FUKING HURTS. BULLSHIT!!" i shouted.

"ano masaya ka na ha?!" i added

"ALL THIS TIME I THOUGHT OKAY NA KO, I THOUGHT THOSE FUKING YEARS ARE ENOUGH PARA MAKA MOVE ON AKO! PERO RICCI MAKITA PALANG KITA NAWAWALA LAHAT NG GALIT KO E! DI KO KINAKAYA, RUMURUPOK AKO RIVERO! NAGIGING MANHID AKO, NAGIGING TANGA NANAMAN AKO"

"dayne i'm sorry"

"I ALWAYS THINK ABT THE NIGHT U LEFT ME HANGING!! THAT NIGHT I KNEW TO MYSELF THAT I AM THAT KIND OF GIRL NA HINDI WORTH IT MAHALIN. LAHAT NG BAGAY NA DAPAT ISIPIN INISIP KO NA RICCI, KAKAISIP BAKIT KA NAGING COLD SAKIN. PUTANGINA YUN PALA YUNG DAHILAN."

"YOU MADE ME FEEL THAT I WAS NOT WORTH IT!"

"DOBLENG SAKIT E KASI DAMAY ANAK KO, ANAK NATIN! AT NAMATAY SIYA DAHIL SA BABAE MO!"

"RICCI ALAM MO SA IBANG TAO MAHIRAP MAGPATAWAD. PERO AKO, HINDI AKO NAGDALAWANG ISIP E. KASI AMA KA NG ANAK KO, ALAM KONG DI NYA GUGUSTUHIN NA GANTO TAYO."

i was crying and crying.

"dayne sorry, that's all i can say now. i know ur tired. take a rest, dito lang ako sa tabi mo i will take care of u."

sa sobrang pagod ko kakaiyak, nakatulog na ako.