𝒄𝒐𝒑𝒑𝒆𝒓 𝒇𝒍𝒐𝒘𝒆𝒓𝒔 : 𝒐𝒏𝒆𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒕𝒔

he's in the rain + noren

Rain smells like calm, it smells like cold and freshness. Rain feels like cool bullets as they hit your skin.

Renjun loves the rain, it makes him sick when he stays outside for too long, but he thinks it's beautiful and soothing so he stands outside during storms to feel the skies gun ammunition.

In times like those Renjun only feels the rain, he can't hear sounds other than water falling into puddles around his sneakers, can't feel the breeze that bites his wet skin, nor can he ever hear his name being so softly called. 

Renjun loves the rain, but Jeno hates it. 

Jeno has to bring in a soaked boy into the house time and time again, has to change his clothes and warm up the frozen boy like a cup of cold coffee. 

Rain brings Renjun calmness, while it brings Jeno worry and heartbreak. 

It's not the others fault, a coping mechanism is a coping mechanism and even if he gets sick during the spring showers he still doesn't touch metal to his skin or burn his throat with acid. 

Jeno still loves Renjun, his heart is held in those cold hands and he doesn't mind as much as he should. Because Renjun is still just Renjun, his hair is wet during May but his eyes are not frozen anymore. 

Their hugs are still warm, their hands still fit perfectly, and their love is still strong. 

Renjun just likes the rain. 

Before the obsession with falling drops the hospital was their second home, the buildings were cold and white and neither of them liked it. 

But Renjun was sick, maybe not the same kind of sick as in May, but sick all the same. His body was smaller, his wrists thin, his personality compressed to bad thoughts and replaying memories. 

A life for a life, his wasn't taken so he tried to take it himself. 

Jeno will never get the image from his mind, even now after months of being back, he still sees red and white tablets in the bathroom they shared. 

His skin had never been that cold before, maybe they both died a little that day. 

A panicked dial of the emergency number that he could barely type, the medic who gave him a sympathetic look as the other was being taken. 

Jeno wasn't the best with emotions, but he cried until he passed out that day. 

He doesn't like thinking about it, doesn't like seeing the white on his boyfriends wrists or how their medications are under lock and key now. 

But regardless of obsession and scarred minds, they were healing. 

Renjun would get sick, Jeno would press a kiss to his forehead, and the hugs would still be warm. Apologies still fell from nervous bitten lips, only to be hushed away by arms around shoulders and the smell of drug store cologne. 

Jeno didn't like the rain, but he grew to accept it because Renjun felt better in it. 

Rain smells like calm, it smells like cold and freshness. Rain feels like cool bullets as they hit your skin.

Rain boosts a mending heart, it soothes burns and cleans away left over sin. 

He didn't mind anymore, his skin might be cold, but his chest is still hot. 

Renjun is still his Renjun, the rain just helped bring him back.