Forever, and Never More

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"They say we leave this world just the way we came into it - naked and alone. So, if we do leave with nothing, what, then, is the measure of a life? Is it defined by the people we choose to love? Or is life simply measured by our accomplishments? And what if we fail? Or are never truly loved? What then? Can we ever measure up? Or will the quiet desperation of a life gone wanting drive us mad?"

//

Kakashi spat the remaining blood from his mouth onto the floor disgustedly. It hadn't even been nearly enough this time round. Again.

Dejected and more than a little bone-weary, he sighed, cursed inwardly and then started on his lonely trek back to Konoha.

How many more? He asked himself. How many more till this would all end?

/

"Tsunade-sama," Kakashi gave a deep bow. "The mission was successful and here is the retrieved scroll". He crossed the room to her table in 3 long strides and dropped the blood-stained scroll onto her table.

"Kakashi," Tsunade sighed distastefully at the blood stains now seeping in through the wood, before she raised her head to address the Jounin standing or rather, slouching in front of her.

She knew that something had clearly changed in him after the Fourth Shinobi World War. Although what exactly, she just couldn't put her finger on. He'd swept up nearly every A, S and Unranked mission since the war ended. She was pretty sure he was already bordering nearly 30 of those missions ever since. Although the danger posed by these missions had been significantly lessened since the end of the Fourth War, that did not mean that the remaining missing-nin here and there would pass up on the chance to stir up trouble in the aftermath of it all. Moreover, in the Shinobi world, each mission posed its own risks - unranked or not.

She wanted to ask him exactly what was wrong with him - was it something to do with the war? Obviously, none of his close friends or Team 7 had lost this time round, so she knew it couldn't have been the guilt of losing yet another precious teammate. And even Sasuke had returned to Konoha. So what was it?

"Kakashi," she addressed again. "Good work, you were fast like usual."

He merely nodded, saying nothing in return.

"You deserve a break, Kakashi. How about you take a week off from missions? Also, Yamato could use some help with carrying out the plans to rebuild the damaged parts of the city." She smirked.

Kakashi finally looked directly at Tsunade's face and paused for a moment before answering, "I'm pretty sure Yamato has more than enough help here, Tsunade-sama. I believe I can help more on the outskirts where we're still clearing up the remnants of the War."

The corners of Tsunade's mouth tilted downward slightly in a frown. She knew he was right. But she also knew there was a reason behind him being so adamant about taking so many high ranked missions that would keep him away from the village for long periods of time at once. She sighed loudly this time and knew that if Hatake Kakashi had set his mind on something, little else could provide weight to sway his decision.

"Fine," she growled. "At least take 2 days off and come back on the morning of the third. I'm sure I'll have something for you. And you can hand me your mission report then."

"Yes, Tsunade-sama." He gave a second bow before he retreated out of the Hokage's office.

"And get Sakura to look you over for any wounds, Kakashi! I know you're not going to go to the hospital anyway!" Tsunade hollered at him as he exited through the door.

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