Forget-Me-Not

Chapter XV: I Never Will

She put her sweater on as the family van passed through the border of Cabanatuan and Baguio City. No one could tell how the girl was doing right at the moment for she was wholly devoid of any trace of emotion. Her head was propped against the window as she stared at the changing scenery outside the car. Carl had been glancing at the rearview mirror every now and then since the time they left Cabanatuan. He knew his daughter was in a completely bad state and should not be approached carelessly for it would just jeopardize the situation. He felt so guilty for not letting her go back to Baguio yesterday, the girl was so insistent that she'd even told her old folks that she would go alone if they couldn't accompany her using the family van. The man had had his reasons; he didn't want to rush things, he wanted her daughter to adjust to it first so the pain that she would be facing would no longer be that bad. He felt so bad about her, there was nothing he could do to console her daughter because he hadn't really gotten a chance to be acquainted with the two brothers himself in the first place, so there was no way he would know what she really felt. For now, the least that he could probably do was to perform his job of giving her a ride.

Phoebe still appeared nonchalant, did it really bother her? Did any of this actually affect her somehow? It did, of course it did. Whatever she was doing right at the moment was the preparation itself that she'd done all night long. She may seem to be oddly composed for a person who had just heard such news, but she'd actually been tearing apart inside. It was one of those times that Phoebe had shown how strong she really was. Maybe it was the outcome of being lonesome for 22 years? And maybe it was a part of the resiliency that Phoebe had cultured all those time? In anyway, the girl was doing just fine, or at least she seemed to be. The vehicle's wheels continued rolling on the road and it didn't take long for them to reach the Green Valley Village. The climate had long switched to 10° celcius and Phoebe's thick clothing had begun doing its duty of keeping her torso warm.

The familiar scenery manifested; the almost identical houses appeared more vibrant in color than it ever had before. The trees, grass, and other greenery stood firmly in their position as if welcoming Phoebe back. And the foggy atmosphere showed its dominance in the whole place. Why did everything seem like showing their misery? It was almost as if these nonliving things were actually sympathizing with her, and that didn't help for the girl just felt it more and the longer it took them to reach the place, the longer she had to bear the emotion she'd been holding back.

At last, after what seemed like a whole day of trip, they finally reached the exact place. Phoebe had told her dad to take her directly to Raine and Ray's house, and when the van finally came to a halt, she jumped out and started to trace the way to the front door with staggering feet. Phoebe could barely stand, she was shaking, she was on the verge of tripping on her own feet. But she did her best. She tried very hard to reach the doorstep. At first she attempted to knock, but when the door didn't open for her after a good while of knocking, she decided to finally barge in. Phoebe was greeted by the odd silence inside the house, it's not like it used to be noisy in Raine and Ray's place, but it just felt so much different this time. There was this unsettling feeling when she started to walk on the tiled floor. It was so uncomfortable that she felt like her chest had become a huge boulder which hindered her from reaching the other part of the living area. Then, at the far corner, right in front of the television divider, a frame that she'd never seen before rested on top of a small table. When Phoebe finally got a closer look, she found out that it was a picture of a boy around 16 years old. It was definitely him, the boy was nobody but Raine and it'd been taken years ago. She stopped right before the table, then the next thing she noticed really shattered her once slumbering heart into millions of millions of pieces. The frame was propped against a jar, and it wasn't a mere jar, it was a burial urn. It was at that moment when Phoebe burst into tears once again, and now all the emotions that had long accumulated inside her which she'd tried so hard to suppress ate their way out of her body. She collapsed on the floor as she howled in pain and in sorrow. It was beyond sadness, and the girl felt like the flames of her life were gradually dying as she lamented over Raine's remains. Her arms stretched forward and found their way to the frame, she grabbed it and clutched it as if her life depended on it. Her tears were gushing out like a broken water pipe, her scream of anguish was reverberating not only inside the house but also the outside vicinity. Anyone who would hear her cry would surely get crept out.