you look cute in red

•4•

EDDIES POV
i stood at the top of the stairs and watched richie leave. he had tears in his eyes and he was shaking. i watched as he ran down my front steps and walked slowly down the street.
"god Damn it" i yelled and slammed my fist on the top of the stairs. the rest of the losers ran upstairs to meet me.
"eddie what happened between you and richie? why'd he leave so early?" stan patted me on my back as he spoke.
"i-i can't tell you, but i messed up" tears streamed down my face as i told him. they all nodded at each other and helped me downstairs. they put me on the couch and put a blanket over me. i was shaking with nerves.
i really screwed up.
he's probably emotionally damaged now.
well shit.
thoughts like this flooded my mind as my eyes stared wide open in front of me. i could hear faded voices but i couldn't quite make out what they were saying.
"eddie!" a familiar voice yelled. i blinked and sat up, propping myself up on the pillow.
"are you o-okay?" bills hands were waving in front of my face.
"no, not really. but richies worse" i sighed and looked down. i felt so bad.
why'd i react like that when he'd asked me?
why?
i liked the kiss, i really really did.
and i liked richie a lot. like a lot!
so why'd i react like that?
fuck eddie your the dumbest man alive.
as everyone at the sleepover laughed and joked, i sat there, cold and empty, sad and regretful.
"come on eddie play a game of monopoly with us would ya?" stan asked, smiling in my direction.
"i'm good, thanks though" his smile turned into a frown. he cocked his head and mouthed the words 'tell me what happened later' i mouthed 'i really cant' back. he sighed and went back to playing.
why'd you react like that eddie?
your so stupid!
fuck you!
he didn't deserve that!
he's probably somewhere crying!
he's never going to talk to you again!
you screwed everything up eddie!
you deserve nothing!
hateful words circled in my head. i hated myself for reacting that way. poor richie was somewhere else crying while eddie sat here and didn't do anything about it but think.
i have to go get him