Dear Diary

Day 8

Dear Diary,

I went to my psychiatrist. She told me to start eating. I nodded and said I was beginning to eat. But, I wasn't. We talked about Harry and about what had happened yesterday and the day before. She asked about my bruises. I looked away from her and she saw how it was a rough topic so just went on to a different one.

She said I was really head over heels for Harry. But I said that he was completely straight and that we didn't have a chance. She disagreed with me and we just went on to a different subject.

It seemed as though the topics we would talk about were all rough. It seemed as if there was nothing  we could talk about without my feelings being hurt or without me being closed off--shutting down completely to the topic of interest.

Oh yeah, I was beaten again today. Harry watched as he was taking books from his locker. He didn't bother helping. I ended up in the nurses office. Ice on my stomach and head.

I came home to a worried mum asking what had happened. I told her that I fell playing football. She bought my lie and stopped with the questions. I so badly want to tell her everything that's happening in my life, but I just can't bare see her in pain because of what is happening to her baby boy.

I walked into my room and laid on my bed. Tears falling down my cheeks. I got up and walked to my bathroom, searching for something. Something shiny. I found it and held the shiny silver blade against my wrist, deciding whether I should slide the sharp razor across my delicate skin. The tears still spilled out of my eyes, making my vision blurry. I was interrupted by my mum when she called me down stairs.

I walked down the stairs. She told me there was someone at the door for me.

I walked to the door and saw him--my angel. Crying. Tear stained cheeks. Red eyes.

"Harry?" I questioned. He looked up at me. Why was he crying?

"Louis, I am so sorry I didn't stop them. All I did was watch. I'm such an arsehole. I'm sorry." He said, confusing me. Why did he care all of a sudden?

I stayed speechless.

''Lou?" He said, making my heart melt as the simple nickname sent shivers throughout my body. His deep, throaty voice calmed and soothed my mind.

"Yeah?" I asked.

"I think I love you." He said, sniffling.

"I-i...but...you...you hate me." I said, trailing off many times with confusion.

"No I don't." He said.

I smiled a real smile for the first time. He gave me his dimpled smile and wiped away a tear with the pad of his thumb as his hand gently caressed my cheek. He pulled my arm slowly towards him and wrapped his arms around me. I did the same. Trying to come to my senses and telling myself that this is actually happening.The feeling was so foreign, yet it felt as if our arms were made for each other. The moment felt so right.

I took in the scent of his cologne and it eased my jumbling mind.

I can't believe this happened, Diary.

-Louis T.