Dear Diary

Day 9

Dear Diary,

Harry stayed at my house for a while yesterday. Well, a long while. Two hours. He explained to me how he's felt about me. He apologized for beating me with his friends. His apology made us both get tearful.

Deep down, I don't know if i can truly forgive him. He's sent me to the hospital and not once did he apologize for it until now. I have and internal battle within me yet again--wondering--if I truly love him, I'd forgive him. It's better to forgive and move forward than hold to a grudge.

I asked him how this could really be happening. He told me he didn't know. He said he felt something different for me since I told everyone I was gay. 

I asked 'How did you feel that way if you were straight?'. Again, he gave me no answer, only a shrug.

We talked for a bit about ourselves. He told me about his family, his likes and dislikes. He told me how clumsy he is. He said he loves to tell the cheesiest jokes that aren't that funny. He told me a few that weren't that funny, but I gave a fake laugh, making him give me a grin.

I told him about my love for football. I told him that I learned how to play piano and guitar a few years ago. To that, he said he can play the triangle like a professional. I laughed a real laugh.

As I led him to the door, he stood outside while I leaned against the doorway on my side. He looked uncertain about wrapping his arms around me and leaning forward to kiss my temple. I blushed as he pulled me into a tight hug and dug his head impossibly further into the crook of my neck while my head laid against his toned chest.

He let go of me and kissed my temple lightly again, muttering a goodbye and walking to his car. I so badly wanted to place my lips on his. Will it ever happen?

This is unbelievable. But it's happening.

-Louis T.