TW! mentions of self hate , self harm , toxic friends , and abusive homes , mentions of suicide.
i didn't want this...i didn't want them in my life. i cut and i cut and i fucking cut to take the pain away and it works until i can't feel that pain..
constant reminders im just a waste of space , not meant to be here. why do i keep trying? i always try and try again but i also fail because i know it's selfish of me...im always called selfish for my coping habits. i tried music...i tried therapy.
none of it works. why can't i stop? is it because im a depressed fucking mess? is it because im supposed to just die..? it's not like i can vent how i actually feel to people because they don't understand. ive always been looked down on by my family....
i don't want your 'oh im so sorry orion." i know you're not. you're showing pity to me and i hate that. i don't want your sympathy. i want to stop...
