Lullabies

Three.

“What?” I yelled, outraged. I shot up out of my seat, placing my hands onto the Principal’s desk to stop myself from doing something I would regret later – namely slapping him until he forgot he was going to call my parents in for a meeting. “Please, just please don’t do this.” I was mere moments away from dropping to my knees and begging, something which I could never ever imagine myself doing. Not in a million years. “Just give me detention, I’ll even do some voluntary work after school finishes. Just please, don’t call my parents.”

I kept my eyes on him, gaze unwavering – something Dad had taught me years ago. Keep eye contact, find one fleck in their eye and keep your eyes on it and don’t ever look away first. Dad was a lawyer, a very successful one at that. He had worked with a lot of famous people over the years and he didn’t hesitate to drop their names into a conversation and act like they were the best of friends.

Principal Ludlow tapped one of his long fingers on his chin, his eyes thoughtful. “Grace, you must understand that it is school policy to inform a students’ parents the second said student is thrown out of class to come to my office.” My heart dropped. Everything seemed to slow down in that moment and I could imagine my Mother – striding up to the school with that air of confidence that radiated off of her in waves. She’d drag me back home and scream at me till her throat hurt. “And considering you’ve been sent twice in less than two hours, I must make the call.”

The wind blew through the open window behind Ludlow and for a moment it calmed me, the cool air washing over my clammy skin soothing some of the inner turmoil that was residing inside me recently. It was like two tornadoes were warring their way through my body, refusing to yield to the other. I narrowed my eyes at him, hoping to use one of the other intimidation techniques my Dad had taught me over the years to my advantage.

He laughed a full blown belly laugh. One that you imagine coming from your Grandpa on Christmas after he had drank a little too much eggnog. “Miss Hartwood, you can stand there and glare at me all day, but I refuse to ignore school policies. Plus, this is a school so I am going to teach you a lesson right now. Maybe, just maybe, if you don’t want your parents involved you shouldn’t harass your teachers.”

I gritted my teeth together, biting back the snappy retort that would surely get me in even more trouble – if that was even possible anymore. The sound of the bell ringing floated through the wood of the door, soon followed by the sound of shuffling feet and raucous laughter of students making their way to lunch.

The more time I spent in here, Principal Ludlow smirking at me in a way that was clear that he thought he was superior, the angrier I got with this whole situation. Yes, it was my own fault and I probably deserved a good lecture on how to respect my elders, but my mother’s lecture would have absolutely nothing to do with respecting my elders. It would be all about how imperfect I am, how much of a disappointment I am compared to Kara, my perfect, older sister.

I stomped out of the office, feeling very much like the petulant child I was acting like. I couldn’t help the anger simmering inside me. My mother’s speech was already revolving around my brain. I stormed out of the school building, the tornadoes inside me ripping every calming thought to shreds, completely destroying anything that had been somewhat bearable about my day.

I passed through the quad like a leaf in the slightly cool breeze, ignoring the various greetings of my peers who looked like they were desperate to talk to me. Obviously there was some gossip that they thought needed my attention, normally I would step up and play the stereotypical role I’d been thrust into, but not today, I had way too much on my mind to care about high school drama.

After I came to the tree I finally stopped, inhaling deeply trying to calm myself before I started doing something as stupid as crying. Crying, my mother and father always said was one of the biggest weaknesses a person could show. The giant oak tree stood tall and proud, the green leaves basking in the sun. I stopped for a moment and like usual, I admired the beauty of the one place on the whole campus I could be alone.