PEACH PIT :: ETHAN DOLAN

TREIZE

July 3rd

So, last night, I kind of slept with Juliet.

Smart, yeah? Guess I've never been great at making the best decisions.

Craig's dad took him home after he let us out of the holding cell, after we sobered up a bit. It was dark, and late, and we still weren't fully sober. I offered to walk Juliet home, because - why would I let her walk alone? It's a small town, but it's still safer.

She asked me where I'd been staying, and I told her I was camping (which I enjoy!) but she said I should spend the night in a real bed. Her parents weren't home, and she was insistent, so I said fuck it.

I took a shower, and when I came back out we just sat and talked for a little while. I was only wearing shorts, she was only wearing a nightgown, we were still tipsy... the next thing I knew we were making out and she was reaching for a condom.

It's just been me and my hand this summer, so I wasn't thinking all that clearly. We hooked up, I spent the night, and things were fine in the morning? We had breakfast, she didn't say anything about it, there was no awkwardness. It was just weird. I'm gonna hangout with her and Craig later I think, if it's still okay then, then I guess it wasn't really a bad decision.

Part of my feels really guilty though. There's this lump of it in my throat that I can't seem to swallow, thinking about Nix and Lonnie.

They're not in my head all the time anymore. I can finally breathe. Or at least, I could. Now I'm struggling, which is stupid because I'm not with either of them. It just feels wrong.

I hope I didn't hurt Juliet. I hope Phoenix and Alondra are okay.

-

"Ethan?" Juliet questions, hopping up out of the car. "Holy shit."

"...what are you guys doing here?" He breathes, eyes widening. He still felt sick after throwing up, after the fear that filled him from the thought of losing Phoenix. This wasn't helping. "Did I-I don't remember giving you my address, I'm sorry..."

"No, you didn't, we were just passing through town and-"

"Are you serious?" Craig spits, pushing Juliet behind him. "Dude, you spend less than a week in town, every day with us, you sleep with Juliet, and then you disappear without even saying goodbye two days later? You had our addresses, you couldn't even write something?"

A chill shoots up Ethan's spine despite the heat, the color in his skin he regained from calming down draining again. "It-I know, I should've, I just-"

"Craig, back off," Juliet mutters, pulling him away. "It was a hookup, it wasn't that serious. I still wish you would've said goodbye."

"Yeah... I'm sorry. This summer was rough for me but that's not an excuse."

Phoenix clears her throat, her arms crossed. "When you mentioned Juliet, you didn't mention that you slept with her too."

Ethan picks at his nails.

He didn't need Phoenix hearing about that now, like this. Not after she just ran out on him because he was covered in hickies from Alondra.

Things were finally starting to feel okay. Ethan had one problem, that he loved both of them, and he was thinking about that. But now? Upsetting Phoenix, Juliet and Craig showing up, hooking up with Alondra, helping Alondra with her dad, grief over Christine-so much changed again in just a few short days.

"Nix, it was over the summer, it was one night and we were drinking," Ethan pleads, grabbing her hands. "C'mon."

"Is this that ex you mentioned who broke your heart?"