Fallen but not broken

Carrier ~Kendra

I nealt there, next to the body of a young boy. He was sixteen, his name was Bryan. I knew he would die eventually, I knew when and where years ahead of time. It's my responsibility as an angel to get him where he needs to go. Why? Why death? And so young! It sickens me. I kneel down over the boy's body as his spirit slowly detaches from the unmoving corpse. A look of fury and sadness crosses my face. Today I've had to carry so many young souls today. Why? All because God seems to think death is a light matter.

I've always hated my job. I used to be among them, among the living, one of them! I died at age fourteen and ever since I've been Gods little helper. Delivering souls. I miss the music, my friends, speaking to people- other than just saying, "its okay." Or "its fine" my favorite "you'll be fine, It just takes some getting used to."- In all honesty it won't be alright for a lot of them.

This boy. This innocent boy dying. Dying almost as young as I did. He wasn't even the youngest on my list today.

I just want to be normal! When I was one of them, human, I was a princess. Well Not really, just an actress playing a princess on a TV show. Still, I never got to be normal then and I don't get to be normal now. Unlike a lot of other souls who just lounge around talking to each other I was chosen to be a carrier. I just want to normal for once.

I jump. I realize I had started to cry, silent tears. I had forgotten about the boy whose spirit is now tapping my shoulder asking if I'm okay.

"Are you?" I snap back. "I mean really! You just died and your asking Gods hired help if she's okay? I need to get myself together. You deserve your happiness even if I can't have mine." I blow my brown hair with its purple streak out of my eye as I look up at him. Examining his soul. He's going up to the big pearly gates. Lucky boy. Eternal peace.

"Well I may be dead but from what I hear angels aren't supposed to cry every time a person dies. That would just take forever!"

I laugh a little at that. "Its not that. Honestly." I stand up brushing off my wings and dress.

"So I'm special! An angel crying because I died." He sayed with mock surprise.

"Not really. As I said. It's not that. You see what you would do after ten years of seeing so many innocent people die, for nothing!!" I say to him, "and now you get to go have a peaceful eternity while I have to watch thousands more die. Lucky you. "

"Whoa, didn't know, sorry."

"Yeah, it's fine. I suppose you want me to take you to those big pearly gates now?" I say trying to end the subject.

"We're you human once? Or have you always been an angel?" He asks surprising me.

"Uh, I used to be human. I was an actress. My name is Kendra."

" Kendra, pretty name. I'm Bryan. I guess after we make it up there that is, that I'll see you around."

"I would if I could but I can't. This is a full time gig. For fifty years I'll be delivering souls for the big guy. There is no way out other than to talk to him yourself and say that you can't handle it anymore,.."

"Which you obviously can't. I mean you were crying so hard I could have wandered away!"

"True, very true. I'm most likely going to get yelled at. They might just let me off for that but I'm thinking not."

"Too bad." He said. Then I grabbed him rocketing into the sky. That was a cool perk of the job of corse. The wings. Not all souls get wings. Those who do get to keep them though. As I set him down before the gates he wispered "I guess I'll see you in forty years."

"Kendra! You're late! He was supposed to be here ten minutes ago! He was asigned as a carrier he might have missed training if he was any later!" The man who takes care of the gate yelled.

As he finished talking Bryan and I sayed "What?!"
"Him, Bryan, he's being put on for a," he looks at his notes "a twenty five year term as a carrier."

"I guess I'll see you sooner then forty years then." He says smiling at me as he walks slowly to the gate.