Don't Wanna Be An American Idiot

State Of Shock

I sat on my bed, curled up in the sheets as the cold air seeped through the walls. I frowned as I looked at the clock.

4:24 AM.

I couldn't ever sleep. Something about being bullied made it hard. I sighed and rolled off the bed and went to the bathroom to take a shower. I used my shower time as time to think about life, about how to get out of school for the day. Things like that.

I lost track of time and where I was going with my thoughts. I sighed and got out of the shower. I rubbed my black pixie cut dry, and chuckled at my frizzy hair. I looked over at the letter telling me that my dad wanted to meet me. It was addressed to my mother, but I took it from her. I smiled slightly, then a pang of anger hit my chest. I checked the time on my iPod, trying to get my mind off of the meeting that would be held tonight.

7:32

'Shit.' I thought to myself and threw on a Green Day t-shirt and ripped black skinny jeans. I grabbed my blue converse and my backpack and ran downstairs and out the door for work. I sprinted down the street in the cold rain of Seattle.

I made it to work within 5 minutes of leaving. It wasn't very far from where my mom lived, and I was an exceptional athlete (so I was told). I sighed and grabbed my name badge from my backpack.

"Is this all for you sir?" I asked nonchalantly, scanning his items. He had a Klondike bar, chips, and a case of beer.

"Yeah. Aaaaand..." He paused. "Something with menthol." He finished and I looked up.

"you're a fan of Green Day?" He smiled and I nodded quickly. I bagged his stuff and gave him his change. He left without another word.

Work continued slowly, the clock ticking away the seconds, though they felt like hours. I took a break and went to the back and grabbed my phone. I scrolled through Instagram, liking one of Mike Dirnt's pictures. It was a picture of him in the rain.

•#seattle• was the caption. It didn't register in my mind at the time. I narrowed my eyes as my phone stated to vibrate in my hand from an unknown number.

"Hello?" I answered hesitantly.

"Is this Jessica Cameron?" A fairly stately and calm male voice asked through the phone.

"Yes this is she." I said, a pit forming quickly in my stomach.

"We regret to inform you that the house you currently lived in has burned to the ground. Your mother did not make it out." He said, his voice still incredibly calm. I blinked. My stomach tied itself in knots and it tightened every passing second.

"So my house and my mom are gone?" I asked quietly, my voice catching in my throat.

"Yes ma'am. We have another relative on file, you will be transferred to his custody tonight. Can you come to the police station tonight at six?" I heard through the speaker on my iPhone, but I was too busy having a minor panic attack to answer. I was breathing heavy and sweating.

Breathe.

Breathe.

It's okay.

I finally calmed down a little bit and answered him.

"Yes of course. Thank you." I didn't give him any time to respond before I hung up and threw my phone across the room in tears. I curled up in a corner and cried into my hands. My mom, my house, my stuff. All gone. Just like that. My mom and I never had a profound bond, we lived together but she never really acknowledged my existence outside of the times that I had to provide for her.

Time passed, and I stood up and brushed myself off. I grabbed my phone from the hole in the wall it created when I threw it. I grabbed my backpack and yelled to my manager that I needed to go, and ran out of the back door. I didn't know where i was going, I was just running. Fast. I took a couple turns and ended up at an abandoned park. I sat on a park bench and just cried. Someone came up behind me.

"Hey. Are you alright?" A teenage boy stood in front of me. I immediately recognized him as one of the school bullies and I stood up defensively. I rubbed my face and dropped my backpack in the mud and slammed my fist into his nose. It emitted a loud CRACK and i kneed him in the nuts, and picked up my backpack and sprinted off again. I probably wasn't ever going to see him again, so why not show him how its done. I ran down a dirt trail i found in a nearby forest and hid myself in case he came for me.

DAD POV

I sighed as I took her file from him. I eyed the picture carefully. Her eyes were like mine, a bright and beautiful blue. Her hair was a black pixie cut.

'Cool.' I thought to myself as I flipped through her school records.

'Suspended seven times since beginning of semester-

'shit. not so cool. the semester started in august, and its november. Sheesh.'

I flicked through her report cards. She had great grades, all high A's. She played soccer and ran track. I turned to the medical records sheet and saw exactly what I didn't want to see.

-ATTEMPTED SUICIDE 4/5/13- and underneath it

-ATTEMPTED SUICIDE 10/17/14- I frowned and looked farther down the page to see she has depression. fantastic.

"She's coming at six?" I asked the man who had given me the file. He nodded slowly and I checked my watch.
5:30.

JESSI POV

I ran and ran until I made it to the police station. I checked my old, scuffed watch and sighed as I walked in.

5:55

"Jessica Samantha Cameron." I said quietly to the woman at the front and she pointed me to a room down the hall. I opened the door and the blonde haired man spun around and gaped at me as I gaped back. I knew him. Not personally, but from pictures off the internet and interviews and his music. I closed my mouth and stared at him, and he stared back.

"Jessica." He said, and my mouth dropped open again. His voice. Was. So. Much. Better. In. Person.

"Mike fucking Dirnt." I said quietly.