Seeing the Thing

Chapter 1

warnings: depictions of anxiety and panic attacks

***

"Come on Y/N, you never go to parties with me, you should just have a little fun before all the rehearsals start, come on," Harrison says, eyes wide and lips pouting, knowing you'll cave.

"You know why I don't go to parties asshole," you grumble.

"Sorry, sorry, I know, just, this isn't really a party, just a buncha theatre kids hanging out. Not even a bunch of theatre kids, pretty sure it's just like a few of us nerds drinking and relaxing before auditions tomorrow."

"And my idea of relaxing doesn't involve drinking with a group of people. What if I don't know anyone there?" You sigh, picking at your fingernails.

"Katie, Ben, Jack, Wendy, those people will be there. Maybe a few other people who are auditioning will be there. You don't have to drink if you don't want to."

"Fine, fuck, let's go," you say, turning him around to face the wall of your dorm room while you change. He's one of your best friends, you've changed in front of him, with him in the same room plenty of times, he's done the same with you.

You pull off your T-shirt and tug down your pants, changing into a cute black dress, you may have been nervous, well you definitely were nervous, your anxiety about to throw you into a panic attack.

Your breathing must've audibly changed because you felt Harrison's arms wrap around you, pulling you tight into him. You both knew when you had an attack that the best way to calm you down was to ground you in reality. That usually meant either talking to you or holding you or hugging you until you felt safe and secure in the world again.

"You know we can just hang out here and watch movies, talk about our favorite Almost, Maine scenes. Don't haveta go."

"No I wanna, it's okay I'm good," you say.

"You're good."

"And we can leave whenever I want?"

"Course."

"Alright bub, let's go," you say, pulling away from him.

He takes your hand, bringing you out of the dorm room. You lock the door behind you and Harrison slips an arm around your shoulder as you walk to the off campus apartment of your mutual friend, Katie, who was having this little get together.

You talked about the show, his vision, how excited you were to finally get to work with him. How excited he was to work with you in all the show's capacity.

"Y/N?"

"Yeah Haz?"

"Don't kill me but I invited Tom."

You groan, your head on his shoulder.

"I know you think he's an ass but he's my best mate, my roommate too, so try to be civil today."

"I will, promise, as long as he doesn't interact with me, I won't make a fuss."

He laughs, "he's not as obnoxious he seems, just very cocky."

"Sure, we'll use that term," you laugh as you knock on Katie's door.

"Y/N!!" Katie greets you, pulling you into a hug, you smile and hug her back, she lets go of you and hugs Harrison.

"How's my favorite Brit doing?" She asks as she lets him go.

"And I'm not your favorite Brit?" You hear Tom's voice and turn your head to see Tom leaning against the wall of the hallway.