Luca (BoyxBoy)

4

Lumipas ang ilang linggo at hindi na talaga nagkikiboan sina Luca at Ryan sa office. Ngunit araw-araw pa rin ang pangungulit nito sa kanya sa chat at text. Minsan, tumatawag ito pero hindi niya sinasagot. Luca also made it sure na hindi sila magkakasabay ng break so as much as possible, kumakain lang siya sa loob ng office nya o di kaya, hinihintay niyang matapos si Ryan ng break niya at tsaka pa siya lalabas. Magkalapit man ang office nila, wala naman silang masyadong interaction sapagkat mag-kaiba ang functions ng kanilang mga department na dinadala.

Nahihirapan pa rin si Luca sa tuwing naiisip niya si Ryan. Tanging ang trabaho lang ang nagpapalimot niya sa kanya.

Araw-araw, patong patong na din ang orders na pumapasok sa Z-creatives. Tambak din ang projects na hinahawakan ng design team ni Luca. Almost always, late na siya nakakalabas ng office. Minsan 11PM, minsan pa hanggang 1AM na.

Mahirap ang trabaho niya bilang manager ng design team. His department received the project and he assigned them to his designers. Bago pa iforward ito sa client, kailangang dadaan muna sa kanya to make sure na nasunod yung instructions at demands ng clients. Kapag approved na ang designs, siya rin ang nagfoforward nito sa factory para magawa na ang furniture. Pagkatapos magawa ang furniture, si Alyssa na yong nagpoprocess ng shipping. Dito na pumapasok si Ryan sa process bilang courier nila sa panahon ngayon na peak season. Peak season talaga basta't papalapit na ang pasko. Kadalasan ng natatanggap nilang projects ay pang-regalo o di kaya upgrade ng interior design ng bahay, restaurant at kung ano ano pa. Kadalasan din rush.

Isang gabi, habang nakauwi na ang lahat, mag-isa na naman si Luca sa floor. Nakatuon lang siya buong araw sa kakareview ng projects ng team niya. A Christmas song was playing around the floor. It was December 12, huling araw ng trabaho nila bago sila mag-Christmas break. Pero hindi niya ramdam ang papalapit na pasko dahil sa trabaho.

Biglang may kumatok ng pinto. Luca was expecting that it was the guard who did the final round bago patayin lahat ng ilaw sa floor.

"Chief, dating gawi," sigaw ni Luca. "Ako na bahala sa ilaw palabas. Paki-off lang po yung music. Hindi ako nakaka-concentrate."

Bumukas ang pinto na hindi napansin ni Luca. "Luca, it's me." Isang napakapamilyar na boses.

Alam na ni Luca kung sino ito. Ayaw niyang tingnan ang taong nakatayo sa pinto. He just continued staring at the layout showing on his computer screen. "Ryan, how can I help you?" he asked, eyes fixed on the computer. Pero nawala na talaga siya sa concentration sa pagrereview ng design sa harap niya. He started to shake his legs.

Ryan put something on the table. Napatingin si Luca kung ano to. "I bring your favorite cafe latte. I thought you might need it."

Luca had been slowly building this wall to keep Ryan out, but that simple gesture tore it all down. Kinilig siya, pero ayaw niya itong ipakita sa kanya. At higit sa lahat, ayaw niya itong tanggapin sa sarili niya. "I owe you for the fourth time now," he said bluntly. Hindi pa rin siya nakatingin sa kanya. He pulled the drink closer to his keyboard. "Thank you."

"Do you need company tonight?" asked Ryan. "It's the last day of work. Natapos ko na rin lahat ng kailangang i-ship before Christmas."

Hindi sumagot si Luca ng ilang minuto. Uminom siya ng latte bago nagsalita. "Ryan, you have been very consistent so far. I admire that. Pero di mo pa rin ba nage-gets? It won't happen."

Umupo si Ryan sa tapat ni Luca. "Alam ko yan. But you left me hanging. Hindi mo nga sinasagot mga messages at tawag ko."

"Now let me tell this to you. Stop it Ryan." Ramdam ni Luca ang sakit ng salita niya. It seemed like someone poured a bucket of water on that tiny ember in his heart. Mahirap man, pero naiisip niya na ito yong pinakamagandang gawin.

Ryan quickly got teary-eyed. Huminga siya ng malalim at yumuko. He had been preparing himself for this moment but he did not realize it would hurt so much in reality. He pulled a piece of paper from his chest pocket and put it on the table. He left quietly.

As soon as Ryan closed the door, Luca buried his face in his hands. He did not know what to feel. He thought he would be happy for finally putting an end to it. But at the same time, he felt sorry for Ryan. Even more, he felt sorry for himself for being a coward and not taking a risk on him. It was clear that Ryan had clean intentions. However, Luca had been so used to the life of being single and he just did not want to go through another rollercoaster ride again. Hindi nya namalayan at napaluha na rin siya.

Luca was curious about the piece of paper Ryan left. He opened it.

Dearest Luca,

I hope you will like this poem I wrote the day after I came over your place.

That Night

That night wasn't special

Blinding lights, music so deafening

Never had I thought

That it would be the start of a new beginning

I admired you afar

For I know talking to you would never stand a chance

Then it all started with a single question

My dire move to catch your attention

You cared to respond

Though I found myself annoying

You opened your doors

To a stranger who was knocking

I did not believe in signs

Until you proved me wrong

I did not believe in destiny

Until you came along

Yours truly,

Ryan

Hindi maipaliwanag ni Luca ang kanyang nararamdaman. Napangiti siya ng hindi niya namamalayan. He opened the drawer of his desk and tucked the paper in. He stood up and hurried out to catch Ryan up. Damn it! Damn you Luca! He thought angrily of himself. Bahala na. I will give Ryan a chance and I will put all the blame on me whatever happens.

Luca opened the door of his office and was surprised to see Ryan. He was leaning against the wall beside the door, head was low. They looked at each other straight in the eyes. Without saying a single word, they locked lips like a couple that had been separated for years.

They both felt the excitement and pleasure of feeling in love. Luca felt a strange but indulging sensation as Ryan's hands caressed his back. It was a feeling that he had not felt for a very long time.

Luca led themselves back inside his office, still madly kissing each other. Ryan kicked the door closed and pushed Luca against it. He slowly unbuttoned his shirt while his lips worked on his cheeks, ears, and the hollow below his neck.

Luca gasped for air, as if he was dead for a long time and came back to life. Binuhay ni Ryan lahat ng damdamin na matagal ng binaon ni Luca sa limot. This is wrong but I don't care.

They both dropped on the floor, Ryan on top of Luca. He took his shirt off to reveal a well-toned body. Luca ran his hands from his navel, abs, chest before finally locking his hands around his neck. He pulled him closer and they kissed once again.