SMOKING ZONE

11 = YES

It's been a week since the smoking zone thing happened and Yibo still doesn't find a way to talk to Zhan, he can't even see Zhan anywhere, and he never comes to the smoking zone anymore. Yibo is always waiting for him but no Zhan ever arrives.

How could he explain himself if he can't talk nor even see Zhan anymore? And the worst part is Zhan never even said anything and just completely avoid him.

Yibo wants Zhan to be mad at him, to hit him, to hurt him, and even wanting to kill him, so he could pay for what he did. But Zhan didn't do anything, just ignore, avoid, and never talk to him.

For the past week, Zhan is the only thing who's been running into his head. He's not a bad person and not that kind of person that will force someone. He wants to clear everything and apologize sincerely, but how? How could he do that?

Forgiveness is the least Yibo wants, he knows how terrible he has done, and it's tough to get forgiveness, he just wants to apologize and pay for what he did because it became a weight into his chest. It feels like there's a giant stone on his chest, crushing every bit of him.

"Yibo how long are you planning to stare at that window? Am I boring?" Zoey loudly sigh

Yibo cleared his throat, "Sorry, I'm just stressed. What are you saying?"

They are at the restaurant near the university eating lunch.

Zoey rolled his eyes and crossed his arms, "I talk to Zhan yesterday, he said he's going to give up on me, so Yibo do you want me to remove that stress you're talking about?"

Yibo's eyes widen hearing Zhan's name and completely ignore what else Zoey jusy said.

"You talk to him? What else did he say?"

"That's all he said because he's also in a rush that time"

"How is he? Is he fine?" asked Yibo?

"He looks stress, but I think he's fine."

Yibo just nodded and admire the window again, forgetting Zoey's existence in front of him. Yibo's mind completely drifted elsewhere and Zhan starts to run into his head again and nothing else. It's only Zhan for the past whole week.

Yibo's still worried sick about Zhan, his bruises, cuts, and bites that he causes, how they'll turn out? Did they scar? Or already fading?

Shit. I'll never forgive myself if it's scarred.

"Yibo! If you don't want to be with me just tell"

Yibo flinches when Zoey shouts at him, yeah, Zoey was still with him.

"I'm really sorry Zoey"

Zoey just rolled her eyes, grabs her bag, and walks out. She's been talking to air for an hour who wouldn't be mad right? Yibo quickly followed her until they reach the parking lot of the university.

Yibo grabs Zoey's shoulder, "I'm sorry, I'm just really stressed and I couldn't remove it into my head. I'm really sorry."

"Really?" Zoey asks and pout.

Yibo just nodded and forced a smile.

"Then Yibo, do you still want to be my boyfriend? I mean you said you liked me for more than a couple of years"

Yibo was stunned by hearing Zoey's words and just nodded unconsciously without understanding what Zoey really mean.

"Then it's a yes! It's official now, you are my boyfriend. Aren't you happy?"

It just sinks into Yibo's brain what just happened, and he should be happy, right?

"Yes, I'm so happy Zoey, thank you for giving your yes to me," Yibo said and hugs Zoey.

Zoey, "I'm also happy babe" 

A COUPLE OF weeks had passed again without any sign of Zhan, and griefs, regrets, and worries completely devour Yibo's system. He thinks anytime he might go crazy and completely lost his mind. He wants to atone for his sin, but how? It's been a month and Zhan is still nowhere to be found. 

Yibo and Zoey are official now, this is what Yibo wants from the very start but why doesn't he feel any affection towards Zoey now? He waited for this to happen for how many years, now that it already happened why doesn't he feel happy? 

Every time Zoey asks him to hang out or to date or whatever her reason just to be with Yibo, Yibo will make an excuse to avoid it. It's not really him, and what happened between him and Zhan really affected him, big time. He admits that he's also a victim but he's also held accountable for the crime he didn't mean to commit. 

He needs to fix everything so he could come back to his usual self, and finally, maybe he can enjoy Zoey's company again and felt the love for her that he forgets.

It's already 7:00 p.m in the evening and Yibo was still at the University finishing some requirements for the semester. Before he goes home, he decides to visit the smoking zone hoping Zhan was there. Remembering the first time he saw Zhan there was also around this time, maybe, just maybe he's there.

Yibo just takes a peek inside the smoking zone and decides to praised, glorified, and worship all the saints, god, and goddesses when he saw Zhan was sitting on his usual spot. He feels like he becomes a religious person and wants to thanks all the deity and the holy spirit. 

Zhan was just sitting on the table hugging his knees, lost in thoughts, and just staring at the ceiling. 

He waited for this moment, but Yibo couldn't find his courage to face Zhan, he's too ashamed for what has he has done to him. But it's been a month since the last time he saw Zhan and he doesn't even have an idea what Zhan had been through since that night. He really needs to do something right now. 

Yibo gathered all his strength and courage and step out of the place he's hiding and came inside. Zhan looks at his direction when he felt someone's presence, and upon seeing Yibo's existence Zhan's expression becomes scared, his hands start to shiver, and his breathing becomes heavy.

No doubt, Zhan isn't just scared, he's terrified to Wang Yibo.

Yibo didn't move and just stand far from Zhan, he could feel how terrified Zhan was and it clench his chest seeing the person he used to be fighting, annoying, and playing all the time gives him a terrified look. Yibo held his hand on his chest indicating his not doing anything.

"Just listen, I'm not going to do anything to you Zhan, I promise. Please just listen" 

Zhan gulps and tried to stop his hand from shivering, he was really afraid of Yibo and didn't know how he will react seeing the person who forced him to sexual intercourse. He felt humiliated, abused, molested and every single night, he would dream of what happened and it becomes his nightmares.

He didn't tell to anyone, because he also felt embarrassed about it. A man sexually harassing another man? Sounds crazy right? So he just keeps his silence.

Just imagine, waking up with intense pain all over your naked body, bruises, and deep bite marks everywhere and a still bleeding lips and was held on the arms of the person who abused you. Just imagine Zhan trying his hard to compose himself and to control his trembling body not to wake up Yibo before he could change and left the place, without making any noise.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to harm you. It just..." Yibo stops for a moment, "It just... I accidentally take a drug that night, and it happened that you're the one with me when the drugs kick in my system"

Zhan is just looking at him and Yibo was completely eaten by his emotions and fall down into his knees. 

"You can do whatever you want to me, and I'll do everything you want. I promise I'll do anything just to pay what have I done to you, Zhan. I'm not looking for forgiveness, I just want to give you justice and pay for the crime I did and maybe time may come that you can really forgive me. I'm sorry" 

——————TO BE CONTINUED. 

Thank you for waiting for this part(｡･ω･)ゞ
Sorry for the inconvenience 〈（_　_）〉