Lost.

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Jasey POV:

"Lexi c'mon out of their sweetie, that's your dads closet" she turned to face me with her big blue eyes, pouting her lips as I walked over to her. "But I miss daddy, when is he coming home?" I pulled her up sitting on my knee as I sat on the edge of my bed. "I miss daddy too, but he'll be home soon my love" it broke my heart to see my baby girl this upset. I know how much she misses Ben, I've been in her shoes before. "Okay how about this, I will give you one of daddy's tops and you can wear it to bed tonight, but you have to promise mummy that you won't go back in his closet?" Her face lit up as she shot a smile back at me nodding her head furiously "now most of his shirts are band shirts so, I'll let you pick one" she jamp straight off my knee heading back to Ben's closet.

I ran to the other side of the room to where my phone was sitting as Ben's ringtone played "Hey" I could hear Danny and Cameron in the background talking "Hi, how's little Lex?" I turned around facing the little figure that had followed me across the room "she misses you a lot" he sighed heavily as I finished "can you put her on?" I lent down in front of Alexis handing her the phone "daddy wants to speak to you love" her smile grew bigger as she took the phone off me putting it up to her ear. I'll leave them to talk, I always did.

I didn't miss Ben as much as people think. What I miss is what we used to be, I miss the jokes we used to share, the laughter. The good and the bad times. I miss how he made me feel. Recently I've not felt any of them, just loss. I feel like I've lost the Ben I used to know.

Alexis came running through to the living room shouting "Mummy!! Daddy wants to talk to you!" I was a little shocked, when Ben called he spent most of the time talking to Alexis. I took the phone off her "okay go and get ready for bed I'll be up to read to you in a bit" she scuttered off grabbing the bear that James had bough her off the couch. "Hey" I pushed back all the feelings I had creating a front so he wouldn't question it. "Hey, are you alright? Lex said you've been down" I just stood there, I didn't know what to say. I can't tell him that I feel like a stranger to him. "Yeah Im great, how are you and the guys?" lie number 1, "Yeah Im great too. The guys are, well they're drunk right now, but if they were sober they'd be great as well" he sounded a bit pissed off at me, which didn't really surprise me "that's good, where are you playi-" he cut me off before I could finish "why are you lying Jase?"

I started breathing heavier and teared up a little "Im not lying Ben" he sighed heavily, something I've gotten used to "Lex told me she hears you crying sometimes at night, if there's something bothering you, you can tell me" I couldn't tell him, he's away right now and he's supposed to be having fun not worrying about his idiot girlfriend. "Im fine, I just miss you" lie number 2. I did miss him a little but not as much as I let on to him.

"I'll be home soon-" I rolled my eyes "so dry your eyes I'll be okay!?" I hissed, I was tired of everything "Im going to tuck our daughter in and read her a bedtime story. Even though she keeps saying that she wants her 'daddy' I'll be the one there for her when she wakes up crying" okay it was a bit uncalled for but he's supposed to be her dad! "Jase its my job! Im trying my hardest, you can't blame me all the fucking time" I didn't want to argue, but every phone call ended in an argument "I can't do this right now, Alexis is waiting for me" I hung up throwing my phone on the couch and drying my eyes as I walked up stairs to see Alexis.

"Are you okay mummy?" I nodded my head sitting across from her "okay darling, what story do you want to hear tonight?"

Ben POV:

"I can't do this right now, Alexis is waiting for me" she hung up on me. Rage surged through me as I punched the bunk door. What is wrong with us? We keep fighting! I want to go back to what we used to be. I stormed off the bus remembering the good times.

**FLASHBACK**

"Ben stop Im going to burst" her face lit up with laughter as we walked down the pier. We were on our way to the fair by the the beach and we were both impersonating the rest of Asking Alexandria. "Hello, Im James and I play the drooms" I mocked James making my voice a lot deeper as we both laughed. "Seriously stop, I can't take it anymore!" Everyone stared at us as we didn't care about the people around us. It was just us two in the world.

We were straddling a bench that looked over the beach, facing each other eating ice cream. "Today was amazing, made a difference to always watching you play on Warped Tour. I mean don't get me wrong I love watching you play, today was just nice" I loved that she stumbles on her words sometimes. I hadn't realised that I was staring at her smiling like an idiot. "Ben... You're staring..." She laughed nervously tucking her hair behind her ears "Im not staring Im admiring the view" I winked at her and watched as her smile grew bigger. I leaned in and kissed her soft lips. I couldn't help but smile into the kiss, she made me so happy.

**FLASHBACK OVER**

We messed up, a lot. We've lost what we used to be. "BEN!!! What the fuck man, you put a hole in the bunk door!!" Danny joined me outside the bus, meeting my gaze he realised what was wrong "again?! That's the third night in a row!" I shrugged my shoulders walking back into the bus "you can't bottle this Ben" bottle this? What is he talking about? I gave him a confused look and he sighed heavily "you're going to have to talk to her" I rolled my eyes suddenly getting angry again "I fucking have been, but every time I try she used Lex as an excuse to not talk!!" I was absolutely fuming. How can she use our daughter as a fucking excuse!? "We will fix this Ben all of us are going to help."

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A/N

So first chapter of the sequel..? I hope its alright and if you have any questions just ask. Why do you think will happen?

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Thank you so much for reading, you have no Idea how much I appreciate it!! <3

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