How He Changed Me

-3-

DIANNA'S POV

i'm all alone, waiting to board the plane taking me to England. i will be miles apart from chris.. not that he's ever with me anyway. but the thought of leaving him, not visiting his grave, the orphanage, rarely greeting his family and my own-- it's killing me. it's killing me inside.

i've already said my goodbyes but it feels like i haven't. truthfully saying, i love it here. i love the idea of being near my loved ones. then again, this might be the best way to let me move on and live a happier life. maybe i'll finally accept the fact that he's gone.

maybe not.

as i was sinking deeper into my thoughts, i heard the announcement for my time to board the plane. this is it. this will be my new life. i secretly hope that it'll be better than before. step by step i come closer to the entrance and board the plane.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

hours later i finally arrived in London Heathrow Airport. i observed my surroundings while waiting for my luggage. there's mostly foreigners but there are also some englishmen around. i saw my luggage and picked it up. i dragged my luggage out of the airport and i immediately saw aunt amie holding a piece of paper that wrote 'Welcome Dee!!' with pink and red hearts all over. 

"hey aunt amie.." i said as i finally reached her. she seemed excited. very excited. i knew the fact that i was her all-time favourite niece eversince i was 5. unluckily for her, she wasn't my favourite aunt. but she's cool... i guess.

"oh my god! you're finally here! i was excited to see you! how are you feeling? aww, give me a hug you cute girl!" she said with her british accent. more like shouted. i just nodded at everything she said and suddenly she pulled me into a bear hug. it was cute, but extremely dreadful. she could literally kill me if she put in more pressure.

"i'm feeling fine.. just a little jet lag" i said. 

"aww.. c'mon.. let's take you home and have some rest shall we?" she replied using a tone that you usually use on kids. truthfully, this is why aunt amie isn't my favourite. she treats me as if i was a 3 year old kid. it's embarassing.

i nodded in response and dragged my stuff towards her car. i put my stuff in the car bunk and went to sit in the front passenger seat . along the way, aunt amie was blabbering something about stereotypes and everything that i just couldn't care about.

i saw the beautifully built buildings and the cute shops along the street we were passing through. it brought a glimpse of happiness in me to see the picturesque view that i usually see in tumblr. i'm living the life, as they said. 

then we passed through a graveyard. i saw many people in black surrounding a particular grave. from my experience, it only meant one thing: someone died. i saw a guy on his knees kissing the tomb, crying. he reminds me of myself. the day chris was buried; i was in my black dress, on my knees, crying on his name plate on the ground. deja vu.

tears were lingering in my eyes. i clenched my jaw until it hurts, just to stop the tears but they still fell. all this time, i finally realised.

i miss him. like crazy..