Moonlight Desires

Chapter 6

After the awkward ending to their third shared shift, Seth worried that Becky was going to ignore him completely or come up with some excuse why she couldn't join him for a fourth. After a few days of strained silence, however, she seemed back to her normal self—as long as that third full moon wasn't mentioned at all. Then she became distant, so Seth never brought it up and things went back to a slightly dimmed version of normal.

It was only when they got to their chosen shifting spot that things started to fall apart. They were in Iowa, in a spot Seth knew well enough to feel comfortable leaving the blanket spread out, and he was chatting about the local terrain mostly to fill up the silence. After he had tucked his clothes and shoes in his bag, he turned to reach for hers and found her still fully dressed, clutching the handles of her tote like a chastised child. "What's wrong?"

"Maybe you should go first and run—take as long as you like—and come back and then I can go." Becky's gaze was skittering around as she spoke, but it never once landed on him. "You know, just in case someone shows up. I can pretend . . . I let my dog off-leash or something."

The conflicting energies emanating from Becky were confusing his senses. Seth could tell she wanted to shift, that she wanted to run and play like normal; he could feel her wolf uncurling inside her, sensing his just as his was called to her. But something in her human brain kept holding her back. "Becky, if this is still about the third moon, it's fine. You don't have anything to feel guilty about."

Becky shook her head emphatically, and when a gentle mist landed on Seth's outstretched hand, he realized she was holding back tears. "I know better. I do. It's just been so long since I've shifted with someone who—" Her words caught in her throat and she looked away, expression equal parts irritation and agony.

"If you're not shifting," Seth said flatly, reaching for his sweat pants, "then I'm not either."

That got Becky's attention. "You have to. I . . . I know ways to go without. It's not fun, and you can't sustain it for long, but . . . you don't. You'll get sick if you don't change."

Seth stepped into his pants and pulled them up. "Guess I'm getting sick then."

"Seth, please." Becky reflexively reached for him and stopped herself, but Seth grabbed her hand before she could pull it away and he pressed it to his chest. "I just . . . I don't want to . . . to take advantage of you or anything."

"Becky, you kissed my shoulder. Not even that, really." Seth grabbed her other hand as well and squeezed it. "If I have a problem with anything you do, I'll let you know, okay? I promise. But we both need to run, so why don't we do that and we'll see how we're feeling after, okay?" There had been countless times when turning wolf had saved Seth from bad moods or dark thoughts, and he imagined it was much the same for her.

Sniffling, Becky nodded. "Okay." She undressed quickly and handed her bag to Seth, starting her shift before he even had their things tucked up in a tree. She didn't run off, though; she had almost started to, but then she caught herself, almost stumbling over her paws.

Seth made a point of crouching down beside her to complete his shift. "Thank you for waiting," he whispered before he began. Becky couldn't exactly smile in wolf form, but she made a gentle chuffing sound that he took as You're welcome. He took his time with the shift, mostly as a way to show Becky he trusted her to stay with him, and then led the way to his favourite path.

Becky's distraught mood lingered through the beginning of the run, but the more time she spent on four legs, the more her spirits lifted. By the time Seth had led her to a little stream, she was almost her normal playful self. She didn't skitter away when he tried to tackle her, and soon they were romping around again, stretching out the run as long as they dared. When the morning had reached its coldest hour, they finally tumbled to a stop near the blanket and shifted back, sprawled out under the stars.