Matapos ang nangyaring kasal hindi muna ako pumasok ng trabaho ng ilang araw. Para kasing hindi pa kaya mag-function ng utak at katawan ko.
Matulog at Kumain lang ang ginawa ko maghapon. I dont even feel to talk. Bakit ba ang hirap maging masaya?
Muli na namang nanluha ang mata ko nang maalala ko ang senaryo sa simbahan ng araw na yon. It really hurts to see the love of your life marrying someone that isn't you.
Ang daming what if's na gumugulo sa utak ko. Kung sana may isa saaming naging matapang at gumawa ng move then it wouldn't hurt like this because I know that we tried. Eventhough we weren't the one for each other.
Nagpakawala ako ng malalim na hininga at pinunasan ang mukha ko na punong-puno ng luha. Tumayo ako at tinungo ang banyo upang mag-hilamos. Sulking will do me no good. Nagsasayang lang ako ng oras. I look up into the mirror and faced myself. I'm ready to give-up. Tama na iyong ilang taon ko syang minahal, he's happy with his wife. Kung nakaya nyang mag-move on kaya ko rin.
Lumabas ako ng banyo habang nagpupunas ng mukha. Lumapit ako sa kama at kinuha ang cellphone ko na napagpasyahan kong patayin ng ilang araw. Now that I decided to move forward with my life I needed to get back on track.
Hindi na ako nagulat ng sunod-sunod na pumasok ang mga notifications at mensahe. I texted my secretary that I will be back tomorrow and prepare the papers that I need to check.
Nang matapos mabasa ang lahat ng messages at mag-reply, sinunod ko naman ang ma-check ang emails ko. Muli kong pinatong ang cellphone sa bedside table. Lumapit ako sa walk-in closet ko at naghanap ng damit. I'm planning to go out tonight to have some drinks.
Napatigil ako sa paghahanap ng damit ng biglang tumunog ang cellphone ko. Lumabas ako at sinagot iyon.
" Mabuti naman at napagpasyahan mo ng itigil yang pagmumukmok! Ilang araw akong tawag ng tawag, Nova! "
" Chill your ass, Portia. I needed time for myself. Don't worry, I'll be back by tomorrow. "
" You better be! Now get your ass up, we're going out. " Napairap naman ako sa sinabi nya. Talaga ngang soulsisters kami nitong si Portia. Parehas kami ng naiisip.
" Kahit hindi mo sabihin I'm gonna party tonight. " natatawa kong sabi. She really knows what I need. I decided to wear a skirt partnered with a tube. Pinatungan ko narin ng denim jacket at nagsuot ng heels. We agreed to meet at the Codes.
" Finally, you decided to move on! This really needs to be celebrated " natutuwang sabi ni Portia. Kumuha pa sya ng alak at tinungga ito. She is currently working at our company as the head of Finance team.
" I had enough. I want to be happy. " I smiled as I said that. Napalingon naman sya saakin at tumili. Hindi rin nagtagal ay hinila na nya ako sa dance floor. Dala na rin ng alak hindi ko na malaman kung anong ginagawa ko, nagpadala na lang ako sa saliw ng musika. I lifted my hands to feel the music and dance to its beat.
We were out partying the whole night. It was still a mystery to me on how I got home. I searched for my phone to check on Portia. Baka mamaya anong katangahan na naman ang ginawa non.
After sending her a text message, my eyes roamed around the room. It stopped to my wall clock. Mabuti nalang nagising ako ng tama sa oras. I still have an hour and a half to prepare for work.
Tumayo ako para pumuntang banyo ngunit para namang umikot ang mundo ko sa sakit ng aking ulo.
Hangovers.
It was really a bad decision to party all night while you have work the next day.
Mabagal akong nag-ayos ng sarili dahil hanggang ngayon ang kumikirot parin ang ulo ko. Good thing Portia replied, she got home safe. It was her driver who picked us up.
