I'm so tired of my life being a constant, "He loves me not". And I don't particularly know why I continue to kill flowers over my impossible wish that any boy could truely fall for someone like me.
-m.c. 10/13/14
I'm happy.
This is currently true; but ask me at 2 am when the only feeling I have in my body is numbness. When tears are rolling down my face & my hips are covered in thin ribbons of crimson red. When I'm weeping at my bedside for God to just take me from this life. Ask me then.
Only then will you know the truth.
- m.c 10/13/14
I once was able to mask my misery. I once lived without a care.
But now my brokenness is inevitable. I am finally unmasked. The monster behind my concealment has come out of hiding. And I am no longer able to hide my brokeness.
Much too often, the thought of affection is dreaded. It can be rather dire. How someone can mean so much to you, that you're willing to make a martyr of yourself for the sake of their love. Yet, you not even leave a imprint on their existence.
And we wonder why there are so many lonely souls in existence.
-m.c. 11/26/14
Through the cloud of darkness she came. And she soon transformed into the ultimate show of light. She is gorgeous; stunning if you will.
But perhaps the most beautiful thing she possesses is that of a history of pain; How she overcame the monster that threatened her very life. And not only did she save herself in seeking recovery, but spared my life in the process.
She is my reason to get better. If she can do this, so can I.
-m.c. 12/16/14
