Bucky Barnes & Sebastian Stan Imagines

S.S. - satisfied

Summary: Basically "Satisfied" from Hamilton with you and Sebastian, featuring Chris Evans.

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I remember the night I introduced Sebastian to Y/N. It was probably the one regret I have in my life. Y/N had been my best friend since high school, and she was absolutely perfect. She had everything - Y/N was the smartest, funniest, selfless, kindest, most beautiful girl I'd ever laid eyes on. The more I got to know her over sophomore year, I fell completely head over heels for her. I've tried dating others, but no one ever made me feel the way she has for the last 23 years. Damn, that's a really long time to love someone.

Love. There's that word again. I've used it so many times when I talk about her - "I love how funny she is," "I love how smart she is," "I love her so much, she's the best friend I could ever have." But I never told anyone, especially not her, how much I loved her - how much I truly loved her. Y/N was everything I wanted in a woman, in a person. But I could never have her.

"Seb, so glad you could make it," I had said, shaking his hand and pulling my friend and coworker into a hug. I had invited him to my birthday party, the one Y/N insisted I have. It was at a rented venue, probably around 9 p.m. or so. This would be the night they met. The biggest regret I'd ever have, I just didn't know it yet.

"Not like I have anything better to do," he replied, pulling away and running a hand through his hair, which he was growing out for the Captain America: The Winter Soldier movie we were doing two months from then. We laughed, and Y/N walked by, wearing a pair of jean shorts that were an inch away from making me uncomfortable and a plain black t-shirt that she tied on the side to make it more stylish.

"Hey, Y/N/N," I called before she walked past us. She stopped and looked around Sebastian to meet my eyes. "Come here, there's someone you should meet."

Y/N walked over and stood next to us both. She was awkwardly shy, as was Sebastian, neither one of them really good with meeting new people. She stood and smiled a little at him, her cheeks turning a light shade of pink. I didn't quite notice that then, but I definitely did now.

"Y/N, this is Sebastian. Sebastian, Y/N," I introduced them. Seb was friendly enough to shake her hand, and they started a conversation. I left them to it, not really feeling the need to stand in the way of their friendship. Little did I know it would quickly become more than that. Within three months of the night they met, they started going out together. Seb even took Y/N to the premiere of Winter Soldier as his date.

I was happy for them - really, I was - I just didn't know how far it would go between them. After two years, I should've realized they weren't breaking up any time soon. I cursed myself constantly when I wished for them to split. I wanted them to be happy, but I wanted her, too. After four years, I should have at least told her. Then, at the premiere of Infinity War, right there on the carpet for the whole world of the media to see, Sebastian got down on one knee and asked to marry her. Of course she said yes, but that one word broke my heart.

Now, sitting in the front row with Y/N's parents at her wedding, I realize how much of a mistake it was to not tell her how I felt. She cried tears of joy as she expressed her love for Sebastian, and I'd wished it was me, but I hated myself for being jealous of him. I wasn't going to tell her now, I couldn't ruin her big day. Their big day. And just like that, he kissed her, sealing the deal of their love for each other and forever stealing her away from me. But now I can never tell Y/N how much I love her. I can't ruin their marriage. That's forever, a crush is not. No matter how much it feels like forever.

23 years might as well be.

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