Little Stories from Big Hearts

Not everyone can fall out of love

I lied.

Okay is not how I felt when you left me.

Being without you was like feeling a deep hole on my chest. This pain took my breath away every time someone mentioned your name.

I tried to deny what that feeling meant.

It felt like a detachment of my physical body and reality.

I was not good enough, you were not great either but I saw that too late, I guess.

It's raining. While I look through the window in this crappy place, I slide my way through my thoughts like the raindrops roll down the window. Leisurely and with ease.

I look back to the way that I acted and I feel shame. It hurt so bad but now it doesn't hurt at all.

It was time that needed to be wasted and now I'm okay.

I don't think about the smell of the clothes you used to wear anymore, or the dimple in your right cheek.

I don't miss waking up with you by my side, and I can barely remember the way your hair used to smell.

You have someone new already and I wish you well.

I have no one to hold. But that's okay.

I'm okay.

I know we swore to love each other for the rest of our lives even though you knew that wasn't going to happen from the beginning.

I forgive you.

I forgive you for making me fall in love with you when you just had one goal. Not an honorable one.

I will go on with my life, so as you're doing. I know I've had committed many errors.

But people outgrow their mistakes.

And my greatest one is you.

I can proudly say that I don't love you anymore.

But being honest: without suffering for a long time first.