WALK AWAY || a.s.

10

becoming a jedi was something marwen learned had to be done in layers and steps. a step that she found the least important--- and most disappointing--- was the disposing of vanity.

marwen had spent her entire life living in the palace of naboo, surrounding by luxuries and art of silver and gold. she had a simple set of robes that she wore when she had begun her work as a royal advisor, but being attached to padme's hip meant that she was often spoiled with the same gowns and jewels for special events. any occasion that presented itself as an opportunity to get dressed up was taken advantage of.

on the opposite end of this newfound spectrum laid the appearence of the jedi.

marwen's clothing was to be replaced. she had been given a simple set of light robes, similar to the ones obiwan had worn. this in itself was a let-down to her previous experience in style.

her dorm, similarly, was severely lacking. on naboo, and even in coruscant with padme, her quarters were decorated in luxury with art and light. expression was something that she took great liberties in, and it made her feel more at home. but at the temple, she had to grow used to living in a closet-like cubicle with a single cot in the corner. not only was there a single, small window, but it had been barred over to only let a few slivers of light through.

but the experience wasn't overall dreary. marwen had encountered many instances in which her mind had truly been challenged, allowing her to take in what it meant to truly become a jedi. the most memorable, in her experience, was the trek to harvest a kyber crystal in order to construct her first lightsaber.

this was a pilgrimage all younglings had to take in their journey to becoming a padawan learner. they traveled in groups to the planet ilum, usually led by a master or padawan. on marwen's particular adventure, anakin had been the one to supervise--- partly because he was in need of another kyber crystal himself.

the ship had been loaded, the jittery group of younglings playing in the recreational quarters. marwen smiled and watched, occasionally nodding when one of them turned her way to point out their success in staff combat.

anakin appeared in the doorway sporting a stoic look as he looked over the group.

"excited to finally get your hands on a functioning lightsaber?" anakin asked marwen, keeping his eyes on the kids.

"are you?" marwen quipped. she was referencing his need to be on the shuttle in the first place, as he'd lost his previous saber in a battle. anakin shot her a defensive look.

"that's not funny, it wasn't my fault." he ushered. marwen only shook her head, a smile turning a corner of her lip.

"yes, i am excited." she said finally. "it will be nice to finally have a real saber and not the glorified plumbing pipes used for training." marwen sighed. anakin let out a chuckle.

"you've been practicing at the temple for some time now." he pointed out.

"i have." she confirmed. "i've found myself to be a bit impatient at times. it is good to finally see a bit of light at the end of the tunnel." marwen thought back to the sleepless nights she had spent trying to catch up on schooling, only to be met bright and early with combat training.

"how has it been? if i may ask." anakin clarified. rarely had he spoken with marwen since her initiation into the jedi order. he knew how close she was with padme, and he often wondered if she held some sort of resentment in placing that extra barrier between the two. marwen sighed.

"so far, it has been everything i expected it to be." she said with a nod. "but tiresome, too. for as much meditation as i do, one would think that i'd have a bit more energy." she explained.

"and your connection with the force, have you received much of an explanation for your premonitions?" anakin asked curiously. the girl shrugged.

"from what i gather, it has allowed an extension of my intuition. master yoda is convinced that it is a reflection of things that could be, not things that will be. but in my experience, everything had occurred as i had foreseen--- except in the instance in which i act--- but it is difficult to try and decipher what it is that is meant to fall into place and what is meant to change. perhaps that decision is solely up to its beholder anyway." she explained weakly. a lot of what it is that she wished to prevent stemmed from a state of anxiety and fear. those were things that yoda had warned against and encouraged marwen to challenge on a daily basis. while her attempts to follow along the jedi code remained earnest, she still struggled to see eye to eye with her superiors on such matters. anakin seemed to ponder this.

"the force is always trying to tell us something. it's just up to us to decide when it is that we listen." he added. marwen nodded in agreement.

"how is she?" she asked softly. anakin felt his pulse quicken, knowing who she meant, and why she had spoken low and indirectly.

"she's well. dealing with the stress better than she has been, i suppose. her sector has strengthened its angle in its course of action in challenging the separatists." anakin told her. marwen felt her shoulders relax at his words.

"good." she said simply. marwen looked over at anakin for a moment, blue meeting blue. "sometimes i feel her worry spill into my own." she said with a soft laugh. they looked back at the younglings.

"me too."

--

as the ship landed on a flattened sheet of snowy ice, the younglings grouped together in excitement near the exit. anakin took the liberty of opening the mouth, ushering words of patience at the scrambling children.

"relax, and stay together! it's frigid out there, you'll get lost if you're not careful." he called as they clambered into the snow. marwen walked slower, keeping in time with the knight. "the squirreliness of this bunch." he grumbled under his breath. marwen laughed at that.

"were you not any better, general?" she asked with an eyebrow quirk. anakin shook his head at the children, not wanting to believe that he himself had been that obnoxious as a youngling.

"i had patience." he said defensively. that wasn't true.

the two exited the ship, walking through the mounds of snow. anakin stepped ahead of the group, calling their attention, and taking the lead in directing them towards the cave that housed the crystals.

when they reached the mouth of the cave, anakin turned to face the group. "remember to keep an eye out for one another. you take the crystal that calls to you, and you come right back out. understand?" he asked. the younglings nodded eagerly before making their way into the cave. marwen took a few steps, marveling up at the gaping cliffs sculpted from ice.

she let her eyes fall towards the gaping darkness that encompssed the cave itself, illuminated only by the light at the entrance. it seemed to glow a deep blue, echoing deep clacks from the thumping of children's shoes.

"it's nothing to be scared of." anakin joked. marwen whipped to face him, a little uneasy. she only rolled her eyes.

"very funny." she took a deep breath before taking a step into the cave, allowing a sigh of relief when nothing spontaneously combusted.

"it's safe, relax. this place is the pinnacle of light energy." anakin assured her. he confidently took a few strides forward before stopping. "c'mon, we can look together."