Let Go

Gail's She's POV

I want to leave him but I can't. I love him, yes admit it. But I shouldn't love him. Bawal kasi. He's my one and only best friend. I want to leave him and let go of this Shitty feelings of mine,but every time I try to leave he's always there. Telling me not to leave. That I should not leave. He's there. He is always there.

"Hey Kurt, will you be fine if I'm gone?" i chatted him
"I will be fine,but don't you ever leave me okay my princess?" He replied.
"Sure, I promise you that" I chatted back.

Ang hirap. Sobra. Everytime I'm asking him that question masaya ako. Pero at the same time nasasaktan. Di ko na alam gagawin ko. He always treats me as his princess. At tuwing iniisip ko na baka pag umalis ako iba na ung tatawagin niang princess,di ko kaya. Ang sakit. Gusto kong ako lng dapat eh. Pero di pala pwede. He treat me as his princess because im his gbf. But I treat him as my prince coz' I like him. ANd thats our difference. Gusto kngo tuparin ung sinabe ko na di ko sya iiwan kaso ang hirap. Ang hirap kasi Mahal ko sya ng higit pa sa pagkakaibigan. At dahil dto sa pesteng pagmamahal nato nahihirapan ako. Dahil dito kailangan ko sya iwan. Sabi nila napakamartyr ko raw. Oo aaminin ko. Pero kasi ano magagawa ko? Nagmamahal lng nmn ako eh. Nagmamahal ng maling tao😢. Isang beses kinausap ko mama ko.
"Ma what should I do? I feel inlove with my bbf... I want to leave him but I can't. Coz' I don't want to hurt him..."pag iyak ko sa bisig ng aking ina
She just hug's me and say
"Nak. You must. You need to let him go. You need to leave him for you to be okay. Nak isipin mo rin ng sarili mo. Minsan tlg may mga bagay na kailangan mong gawin para sa sarili mo. Minsan kailangan mong makapanakit para lng maging maayos ka. Nak.. maawa ka nmn sa sarili mo. Okay? Layuan mo muna sya at ayusin mo muna sarili mo. Learn how to let go of ur feelimgs for him din. Anak please? Ayokong nakikita kang ganto. I know mahirap sya, but ket minsan lng nak para nmn sa sarili mo eh. So after this kausapin mo sya okay? Maiintindihan ka nmn ata non? After all magkaibigan parin kau. All you have to do was to explain everything to him okay? Dont worry mama's here. Di kita iiwan nak"then she kissed me on my forehead...
"I'll try my best mama. Thank you Mama Te amo:>" ani ko sabay yakap sakanya.

After that day,pinag isipan ko talagang mabuti lahat ng gagawin ko. At lahat ng yon ay gagawin ko na ngaun.

"Kurttt gising na aba!" Mensahe ko rito. Its already 8 am na kasi at hanggang ngayon di parin sya nag oonline.
"Wahhhh bataa gising naaaaa"
"Kurtttttt luh syaaaa"
"Gising na kasi:<"
"Oi usap tau:<"
"May sasabihin akoooo" I chatted him
After 10 minutes bo0o0m ol na po ang lolo nio HAHAHHA.
"Good morning prinsesaq💙" he chatted me.
"Morning " I replied
"Ito nmn sorry naa pfttt,galet agad eh. Cge ka tatanda ka agad nian🤣🙈" mensahe nito
"Anyway anong sasabihin mo?"pagtatanong nito.
"Ahh kasi.... uhmm wag ka muna magagalit ahh.?"kinakabahan kong reply sakanya
"Ano ba un? Sabihin mo na kasi to namn. Hhaahah"reply nito.
Makakatawa ka pa kaya ng ganyan pag sinabe ko na sau ung dapat kong sabihin? Sana oo. Sana ket mawala ako maging masaya ka parin.
"Ahh kurt.... alis muna sana ako okay lng ba?"reply ko sakanya
"Akala ko ba di moko iiwan? Nagpromise ka dba?"he replied
"Oo. I know,pero kasi kurt kailangan ko eh sorry ah..."kinakabahan kong reply sakanya
"Bakit ba? May nagawa ba akong mali? Tell me.. please?"pag susumamo nito
"Kurt I just need some time. I need space okay lng ba? Kailangan ko munang ayusin sarili ko so that I can assure you that when I go back everything will be okay" I replied
"Bakit?..".....Kurt
"Kailangan ko muna umiwas sau/sainyo. Please kurt?" Reply ko rito
"But you promised me that u will never gonna leave me. YOU PROMISED ME!!" Reply nito
Agad akong nanlumo...kasi alam ko. Alam ko na nasasaktan na sya. Pero ano magagawa ko? Kailangan ko rin tlgang umalis. Pano nmn ako? 😭😭😭.
"Kurt babalik nmn ako eh. Need ko lng tlg muna magpahinga please intindihin mo nmn ako ohh. Ansakit na eh. Sa totoo lng ang hirap.:<"
"Kaya ko nmn gawin yang promise ko pero bago un need ko muna ayusin at pagalingin sarili ko. Kurt space lng nmn eh di nmn tlg kita iiwan. Please?"pagsusumamo ko sakanya.,,pero wala he just seenzoned me. Like wtf?