There are two kinds of love

Getting to know one another part 1

The air was knocked out of me as Arthur bolted forward and threw his arms around me. He was kinda suffocating me but I didn't want to ruin the mood he had just created. My arms were crushed to my side as his head nuzzled the crook of my left neck.

Lick me.. I dare you, you little dooche.

After a couple of minutes, I managed to wiggle one of my arms out of his personal prison and bring it up to pat his head gingerly.

"Erm.. You alright there, Arthur?" I asked, my eyes scanning the area for anyone I knew.

This could totally ruin my reputation.
..PFT, HA. What reputation? .. Oh I feel sad now.

Arthur didn't move for a while. I think he's asleep.. Well, fuck. Minutes passed and the only things I could hear were Arthur's shallow breathing and a ringing in my own ears.

"..I'm sorry, Sarah," he whispered. I barely caught what he said. But when I did, my breath hitched in my throat.

"What?.. W-what're you on about?" I stuttered. Why was he apologising? Why did he hug me?

..Is Arthur on drugs?

My eyebrows furrowed together as my eyes concentrated on his shoulder; the curve moving up and down with every breath Arthur took.

Just when I was about to confirm Arthur falling asleep on me, be spoke up.

"I'm sorry about Lukas.."

My reality shattered. I'd spent the last couple weeks distracting myself, keeping my mind occupied as to not break down (though that failed on one occasion) And here Arthur comes, shattering my little bubble of fakeness. I felt like my cocoon had been ripped open. The me, who was undergo serious recovery from the accident and progress to a new outlook, was ripped out. My body became frigid.

"Why.. Why're you?" I couldn't finish my sentence. My throat became dry. The wetness welling up inside my eyes instead of my mouth.

My blood ran cold. I didn't know what to say or what to do. How do you answer this without breaking down? How do you get out of this without losing it? I've tried so hard to build up my barricade. So long and hard have I tried to mould the perfect wall so no one can get in. And now it's crumbling around me just by someone -who means nothing more than a wrapper on the street to me- who had uttered four words.

Why did it have to be me?

Before I had time to fight back the tears, they were already making their way down my cheeks; falling onto Arthur's shoulder and dissolving into a dark patch that screamed 'why'. My shoulders, no, my body, began to shake, all the anguish, all the sadness finally making it's way up to the surface, ready to push through and be noticed.

..Why now?

Arthur must of felt this as his hug became tighter, his hands gripping the black school blazer that matched my heart. His face buried deeper into my neck, as if he wished to become one with me and take all the pain away. Why was he so bothered how I felt? Why did he care?

"You were always alone," He began. I could feel his voice rumble through his chest and surge through my own. "When I first started, every girl was practically eye raping me. But you.. You didn't even bat an eyelash towards me." Arthur laughed lightly, trying not to disturb the peace. I suppose he was trying to make light of a bad situation. "Since then, I made it my goal to at least make you laugh. I've been down the road of loneliness. I know why it's like to have no one." In that moment, I couldn't help but wonder what had happened in Arthur's past that had made him utter those words. What had happened to him to make him feel alone? I soon came to the realisation that I couldn't listen to anymore. I forcefully nudged out of his hold, pushing him away from me.

"Don't act like you know me!" I spat. Anger coursed through my veins, spreading through out my body making me feel hot. However, I was too angry to care.

"Don't you fucking dare act as if you know what's going on inside my head!" I continued, my voice raising after each word.

"You know nothing. All you know is that Lukas died. You don't know how, you don't know why. So stop pretending you know more than me." By now my chest heaved. My hands were bawled into fists by my side. My already bought flower hanging loosely from my fingers.

"Others have lost more than me. I know that. You may have lost more than me. But it hurts. Lukas was my everything. He was my big brother. I'm told to get over it and move on. But I can't. I can't. He was my best friend." My voice began to crack, my eyes welling up with more shameful tears, "He was my rock, my hero." By now, my voice varied from myself to a 7 year old girl.

Through all my rage, Arthur just stood there, staring at me intently. His gaze sent shivers down my spine, but my anger deflected it. His face held mixed emotions; sadness, concern, understanding. But I didn't care. Why was he making me talk about this?

I groaned to myself, bringing my hands up to grip my hair. It's times like this I wished I was Dorothy. I wish I could click my shoes and be home..

That and the fact I could have a puppy.

Arthur slowly began to make his way forward, and my instincts kicked in. I moved backwards, my hands raising into a self defence stance. I scowled, my breathing becoming heavy. When he got to me, Arthur raised his hand. But no warmth enloped my body. Instead, i felt him rest his hand on my head.

.
.
.
What?
Unable to hold in the tears any longer, more rolled down my cheeks; my eyes burning. I clenched my teeth as Arthur ruffled my hair, his lips raising into a warm, loving smile.

"I'll always be here, sunshine," he started, his hand moving down to cup my cheek. "You don't have to be alone anymore," he ended. Arthur's blue eyes softened as they gazed into my emerald ones.

"I'm here for you, Sarah." That was it. That's all it took for me to break down. My barricade broke and I fell to my knees; my hands covering my face as I wailed loudly. This isn't what I wanted. Lukas wouldn't have wanted this. I felt so ashamed, but I couldn't stop. My chest ached, as did my heart. No one deserves to have to bury their best friend.

Lukas.. I miss you so much.

Arthur knelt down, bringing my broken form into his arms as he made 'shhing' noises. He creased my hair soothingly. He really was a nice guy. There really was a gentle, kind boy under all that sarcastic, narcissistic, smirking facade.

Arthur, thank you.