Girls Guide to: Romance

Why Do They Do This?

1. Mosquito Leg

Show your leg to the girl. She'll think your hairy, mosquito bit leg is incredibly appealing.

GIRL POINTS: 3 OUT OF 5

2. Ask for Pictures and Location

Make sure you ask for her picture and where she's staying. When she asks you to leave her alone, DON'T LISTEN. She's just playing hard to get.

GIRL POINTS: 5 OUT OF 5

3. Dirt Foot

Rub your bare, dirt-encrusted foot onto the top of her feet. Make sure you scratch her with your unclipped toe nails. 

GIRL POINTS: 4 OUT OF 5

4. Lick Objects

When she hands you something to hold onto, make sure you lick all over it and rub it all over her. When she gives you a look of disgust, she's just holding back intense feelings of lust.

GIRL POINTS: 4 OUT OF 5

5. Dating Offers

Make sure you ask her over and over, if she says "No." once....or five times....it doesn't mean she won't change her mind. Keep asking. She'll wake up one day realizing she really wants you.

GIRL POINTS: 3 OUT OF 5

6. Leg Cramps

If you have a leg cramp, make sure you make intense eye contact with her. Don't look away even if she does, then shake your leg where its cramping really fast. She'll see you have skill.

GIRL POINTS: 5 OUT OF 5

7. Whistles

Make sure you whistle very loudly (the louder the better) in a public place with her when ANYTHING happens. All the ladies love getting their ear drums busted out. She'll thank you later.

GIRL POINTS: 4 OUT OF 5

8. No Presents

On Christmas Day, or any other holiday that includes gift giving, make sure you give her nothing. When everyone else is opening presents, all she could ever want is the smile on your face when you get a new TV.

GIRL POINTS: 4 OUT OF 5

9. Burps

When you're on a date with a girl or anywhere where y'alls faces are close, make sure you burp right in her face. The odor coming from your mouth is equivalent to a wonderful cologne. All girls love when you do that.

GIRL POINTS: 3 OUT OF 5

10. Being Handsome

If you have good hygiene, manners, clean hair, clipped nails and smell good...please, just get away from her. Odds are, she won't think you're attractive. Ignore all hygienic needs, then try to win her heart. 

GIRL POINTS: 0 OUT 5

11. The Hand [MAJOR]

Now, this will score you major girl points. You know those little treasures in your nose? Well girls treasure those more than anything. She wants nothing more than for you to dig them out and wipe them on her hands and clothing. Better yet, aim for the face.