𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙗𝙡𝙖𝙘𝙠 𝙨𝙚𝙖// 𝙆𝙞𝙢 𝙏𝙖𝙚𝙝𝙮𝙪𝙣𝙜

5. // 𝑻𝒆𝒎𝒑𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏

I was still in his embrace, trying to calm down. It was hard, but by smelling his calming scent I calmed down a bit. He started stroking my hair, showing off his comfortness.
- Is everything okay?- He asked very quietly, trying to make me feel better.
I slowly nodded, answering his  question.
He slowly let go off of me and looked at my face. I was looking down at my feet, just feeling his eyes on me. Suddenly, I stared bitting my lip, out of my intention as I always do when I feel sad or scared.
- Are you sure, Yoojin?- He asked, sounding very sudectively. I finally looked at him, still bitting my lips. His eyer were indescribably attractive, It didn't move off of my actions. It felt like he was eating my soul out with his piercing eyes every second.
- N-no,- I told him while stuttering out my words.
He didn't say anything, he just looked at me while licking his lips.
The temptation in the room is what started to appear clearly in the air.
- Yoojin, wouldn't It be easier to tell me your tragic story right now, and let all of the weight off of your shoulders?- he asked, suddenly coming closer to me.
I mean he has a point. I could just tell him everything, feel better about myself and fully move on, bit something is still stopping me from doing that.
- Look, I'm not telling you by force to tell me everything, I accept It if you want to tell me until you are ready,- he spoke stroking my back in a comforting manner. The temptation was still flying in the air, making me feel nervous. He kept on stroking my back while I tried to get myself together and to think about telling him about that incident. I don't think that I was just ready to tell him everything I remember. Even so, there are some parts in that incident that I don't remember at all.
- I don't think that I can tell you about that incident, It's just really hard for me to speak about It,- I said, after sighing loudly.
- It's okay, I get It,- he spoke, finaly looking somewhere else and not piercing me with his beautiful eyes. I just didn't know how to tell him everything. For some It might seem like not a big deal, but for me, It is very important. While we were in complete silence, I remebered that Yoongi also was hidding his incident. I didn't really want to bug him with It, but maybe he wanted to speak about It.

- Yoongi, do you mind speaking about you're incident? I mean If you don't want to speak about It then It is completely fin,- Yoongi sighed out loud, making me not finish my sentence.
- Okay, I will speak about It, but please don't judge me for anything that I'm going to tell you,- he said, letting out a small smile, then changing his sitting position. He sat fully in front of me while staring in my eyes once again. 
- It all started when I was a teenager. I was a quiet kid, a total introvert who didn't have any friends and would get embarrassed easily. I remember fully how everyday I would get back home, run into my room and cry myself down until I slept peacefully, but still my dreams never remained peacful at all. At that time the only thing that would make me happy was music, oh dear, how much I loved It,- he spoke as he was trying to hold in his tears. For comfort I grabbed his hand and holded It in my arms, slowly stroking It, making him let out a weak smile.
- I would always stay up late producing or listening to songs, giving in all my best. My family was poor so since I couldn't really get a job, I decided to sell my music, but even still I'd get ripped off. Since I worked hard, I thought my parents would be by my side and be happy with their son, but that was the complete opposite,- he continued speaking while his face was full of tears and his voice was full of pain. I couldn't look at him like this, I just wanted to give him a big hug, but I decided to let him speak everything out.
- They hated me for It, for my hobby. They screamed at me day and night, for being such a loser. I thought that they hated me just for that, but that was not all, they hated me for everything, for being pathetic and not being a good son. At that point I just wanted to kill myself. I already had depression and anxiety and my parents weren't helping me alot, but then,- he said, fully breaking down and falling in my arms, hugging me tightly. He then let go of me, looking at me with his puffy eyes.
- And then one night when I had enough, I drank some alcohol, hoping that It will make me feel a bit better, but still I felt like a piece of shit. I did want to die, I really did, but something was holding me back from doing that. When I was drunk, I got home very late at night and then my father beated me up until I was almost lifeless. I was still laying on the ground at around 6 am. in the morning, when I suddenly woke up. I somehow stood up, I found some gasoline, poured It around the house and lit the house on fire. I somehow felt better until I heard my fathers and mothers screams,- he said shaking and crying loudly. I was shocked at hearing him say that he burned the house down, but I tried to not really show It on my face.
- I was looking at the house burning down, I didn't even save my parents, I thought that they deserved It. The police and the firefighters arrived, who questioned my actions after my parents were saved. After everything I was scared of being arrested, and I actually wasn't even though my parents knew that I did It, I guess they wanted to give their own punishments for me. They still abused me until I told them that I was going to go to univeristy so that I could later in life get money for them and also myself since they were poor. They accepted It and gave me a bit of money they had. With my own hard work I was able to pay for the learning of social sciences, even if It wasn't my thing, It was the only learning that I could've gotten,- he said, pouring his heart out. I hugged him again telling him how sorry Iam for everything that he has gone thru.