A talk with death

I always hear them call my name, yet I never know which one is mine. For an adult would see me as their lover, or a child to a mother. I know nothing of my origins, I simply exist to help lost souls move on.

"Where am I?" a voice of a man cried out.

"Honey, where have you been?" I replied.

Though my mind had been lost in thought I shifted so quickly. Without warning I changed forms likely to appeal to the lost soul.

"Dd-Daisy is that really you?" the man spoke out stuttering.

"Yes honey, I have been waiting for you all this time" I calmly told him with a smile.

I spoke of events I had no memory of. Jack had been talking about his experiences too. Jack? A name common yet I do not remember him. Jack continued to talk until he began to feel tired.

"Daisy, I'm truly grateful I was able to see you again. If I really am dead, I hope I see you on the other side" Jack said with a gentle smile.

"Jack, you won't be alone ever again" I said as my hand reached out.

"Thank you" I whispered to myself as Jack reached out to me.

When our hands had met, Jack had disappeared. Like a leaf in the wind, he had passed on and found peace.

The more souls that had passed on, the more lost I began to feel. I change forms to every soul I meet. I never know who I really am, I am formless yet not. I shape into a human and just as quickly into nothing.

"Where am I?" A voice of a woman cried out.

I turned to her and changed immediately.

"Clover, everything is going to be okay now" My old raspy voice called back.

Clover turned to me with tears on her face as she began to call out

"Father? Father I missed you. I'm sorry I didn't know enough for you Father"

My hand reaches for her head and I hug her close to my chest.

"Clove, having you as my child was already enough for me. Now let's go, your mother is waiting for us" I said in a soft tone.

As I began to hug the woman close in my arms, she disappeared, and I had become shapeless yet again. I continued to lose more and more of myself until I was unsure of my purpose. I am just a passenger to this duty. Was this my instinct? Am I able to shift without thinking or speaking and recall events without being there? Or am I just watching along the ride without a true duty.

As I was lost in my thoughts another soul had landed before me. This soul was different, it was a child. As my body began to move towards the child I hadn't shifted yet. I began to worry more and more, for my duty to help these souls pass on. When I finally approached the child, I had still been formless yet, she looked straight towards me and I shift.

I felt scared and confused because my forms would take shape as the soul appeared before me yet, only now this late had I shifted. My arms grew shorter same with my legs, my voice grew higher and by then I realized. I was in the form of a child.

I stood there waiting for this form to speak but to no avail. I had grown accustom to my forms speaking for me and I began to worry. I was yet again stuck in my mind until the child called out to me.

"Are you okay?" she asked politely.

"I-I think so?" I said unsurely.

"That's good then! My mom always told me to be positive no matter how sad you feel" the girl said with a large smile.

After talking with her I realized, I was in control. I was no longer some passenger on a train, I was the train. I jumped up in excitement and began to yell out in happiness.

The girl looked at me with a strange look before laughing at me

"You're so strange" she jokingly said.

We began talking lightly until I remembered my duty. My sole purpose and existence are to help lost souls move on. If I'm unable to help this child move on what purpose do, I even serve. So, I asked.

"How did you get here? What is your name, I forgot to ask that"

I had grown accustom to my form knowing the names of the souls. When I asked the child, she turned to me.

"I don't know how I got here. But my name is Jenny" she said without a clue in her eyes.

I was confused, speechless even. For I was unsure what to do about this.

"Jenny, how do you plan to move on?" I asked.

"Move on? What do you mean by that?" She replied.

This child was truly innocent to the meaning of death. She had not learned of it yet.

"If you mean leave, I'm not leaving any time soon" She spoke out confidently.

I looked at her with both happiness yet also sorrow. I would be able to talk to someone, yet I would not fulfill my purpose.

"I promised my Mom I would wait for her" The child said calmly.

I was unable to say a word. This child likely knew she had died but is unable to pass on. I had not a clue what to do now. I have no memory of helping souls that refuse to pass on.

"Then I shall wait here with you" I replied.

She turned to me and began to cry.

"Thank you" she whispered.

Jenny began to run towards me to hug me and as she hugged me, she disappeared. Gone like every other soul I helped once before.

This was many years ago and my forms continued to help souls pass on. It has nearly been 40 years today since saw Jenny. I still had no idea where she had gone. I promised to wait with her, yet she isn't here.

The past 40 years I began to grow accustomed to being a passenger. I began to learn how to speak like the souls that passed on.

"Where am I?" A raspy feminine voice called out.

I turned to the old lady; I began to see things. Things I never experienced. I began to see memories of her. I began to cry as I approached her. I tapped on her back and she turned.

As she looked down to me her face had looked younger. She began to cry alongside with me.

"Mommy, I promised you I would wait" I yelled out with a smile.