Missing In Action - Han Jisung ff

in another life, I will be the best

Do Byungjoo P. O. V

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To my daughter Do Byungjoo,

      Princess, the day you were born. I am so happy to hear that I have a daughter instead of son. I promise mother, I will take care of you, I will teach you how to walk, how to draw and everything. I want to see you happy. I want to protect you from the dark world.

Remember when you were 7 years old? I remember the first day you meet your first best friend, ha young. She's a nice girl and you look really happy to know her. I was happy too untill I always play with you two. I even dress as a princess just for you to be happy even it's embarrassing.

When you turned 15, I never knew you were already a grow up teenager when you bring a man home. I don't like the boy you brought that I kicked your so called boyfriend out from the house. By that, I making you mad till you didn't want to talk with me for a week. I said it's for your good but you denied it and said that man is good enough for us. I gave you a chance to invited him next time. But what I didn't expected is when you came home crying to mother and father about how he cheated on you. My anger took all over my body to searched for him and punch him in the face. He got a nice bruised haha.

You finally realized your mistake and I told you, how much I love you that I know which guy is the best for you. I can see it just like other father do.

The day your mother died it's when you turned 17. My world fall apart and i'm so broken. I can't think straight and I can't even accept it. I'm jealous to see you so calm.

You said to me 'father, God loves her more' and me, being a stupid father I am, I said God is selfish because I love her too. While what I don't realized is,
I'm not the only one who feeling this way. I'm not the only who sad. I keep showing my emotional untill you need to be calm just for me.

Byungjoo...

From the start, am I even your father? I promised that I will do everything to make you happy. But at the end, I'm the one who makes you suffer. I make you changed.

While all the guy trying to save you from me, I'm the one who make them return you to me. Because to be honest, I can't see you walk away from my vision. The day I kicked you out from the house and ask you go to jisung, I know it's the right thing for me to do. I know jisung is the one when he trying to fight me. But me being selfish as always, I don't want to see you go away from me. So I run after you only to be hit by a car.

That's how I ended up here. And if you read this letter, I probably died right now.

Princess., you are the pure daughter ever. You are so nice and beautiful. You got your mom eyes and smile, you got your grandpa strength. I don't deserve to have a daughter like you byungjoo. I treat you so badly that I never use a chance to ask how are you, have you eat, how was your school.. instead I being a jerk. I failed as your father..

I make you cried and called you a killer while you're not. You not like me because you 100% just like your mother. The nice women ever.

Your graduation just in a day, right? I hope you don't feel lonely. I am up there, watching you. So please put your beautiful smile and enjoy your last day as a student. Have fun with jisung and his friends that you talked about. I want to know more about them but it seems like my time has come.

I hope jisung will take care of you and always make you happy. Because if he don't, I swear I'm gonna come back to life and kill him. Haha.

Here, the end of my letter. I just want to know that I love you. I love you so much and every harsh word that I used to said to you, I didn't meant any of it.

Do Byungjoo... Me as Do Kangjoo, I promise I will be the best in another life.

Till we meet again :)

          Love,
Your father.
(Do KangJoo)

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"He loves me.." I mumbled as my tears already drop on the letter I holding.

"Your father actually is a nice guy." Jisung said and I looked at him. I laid my head on his shoulder and sigh in between sob. "He is.."

"If only... I-" I was about to say it when jisung quickly pull me in his embrace. His hug is the most warm thing ever.

"Byungjoo, it's okay. It's not your fault everything that happened must have their own reason. So please don't blame yourselfm mhm?" He said while petting my head non-stop. I just hug him back decided not to blame myself because he's right.

Everything has their own reason and this is my faith.

What can I do?