Cigarettes

[TW] Friends and Enemies

The room was dimly lit with only a small lamp being the source of light. A figure hid under the thick covers, her slumber getting disturbed by the loud doorbell echoing throughout the whole house.

Slowly, the figure got up. Deep, dark circles sat under her droopy eyes. Her clothes were a mess, her hair disheveled and her eyes puffy and swollen. She dragged herself to the gates, seeing a familiar figure standing on the other side.

She turned to open the gates as the man took in her miserable appearance. She let him in, slightly shuddering due to the cold weather.

"Heavens, Siyeon," The man exhaled,"What have you done to yourself?"

The said woman sighed in response as she went back inside her warm house, the man following suit.
She sat in the living room, about to open one more bottle of soju to ease her growing pain. The man grabbed the bottle away from her tired, exhausted grip. He inspected the surroundings and he let out a frustrated sigh at the sight of the mess.

"Siyeon, how many bottles did you drink?" He interrogated, his expression serious and stern,"All of this in one day? You're killing yourself,"

Siyeon snorted, her hand finding its way to a lone potato chip sitting at the glass table. She flicked it to land on her mouth, chewing on it with a slight crunch as it was left for hours on the open air.

"Maybe I want to," Siyeon spat out, her hand grabbing yet another potato chip,"Maybe I want to kill myself, dad,"

"Siyeon...," Her dad's head dropped, he gripped the bottle in his strong hand. Putting it at a safe distance from the woman.

"Maybe i'm just distracting myself," Hurt was evident in her voice as she spoke,"Maybe I want to die slowly. Maybe I want to suffer,"

"Siyeon," Her dad began, his eyebrows furrowed in concern,"Is it Bora?"

Siyeon flinched at the mention of her lover's name, her eyes focusing on a small chip to distract herself.

"So it is," He concluded, sitting beside his daughter. He then put a comforting hand on her shoulder,"Tell me all about it,"

"I miss her," She began, sighing hard as she clutched her head,"I want her back. But I have to face the consequences of my actions,"

"I feel dead, dad," Siyeon whimpered, her breathing slightly ragged,"I lost her and my son. I can't go on. It's eating me alive, I want to just get my life over with but I won't suffer that way,"

"Siyeon," A hand comfortingly pat her back in a slow motion, his eyes focused on his daughter's pained expression,"Don't be too hard on yourself. People make mistakes, we're not perfect. Life is also too short. If you want her back, call her. Tell her what you feel,"

"And i'm very sure she doesn't want you to suffer either,"

"Dad, she suffered for more than a year. Alone, all by herself, out in the streets with nothing but the mindset of survival," Siyeon argued, sighing as she messed her hair up.

"Don't you think that she had that mindset because of you?" The man carefully asked, cautious to not hit a nerve.

Siyeon pondered for a moment. Memories about how Bora kept on professing her love for her even though the wolf had a fiancée. She thought about how Bora completely broke when she had a panic attack because of her mere presence. She remembered how Bora gave up on her, because Siyeon had a smile on her face even without her presence.

She remembered how Bora just wanted one hug from her as a closure. The short woman just wanted to feel loved, she just wanted to feel the arms of the person who stood by her side since the passing of her parents around her just one last time. And Siyeon never gave it to her.