Unleash

8

"WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG?" Irfan asked as I walked past him.

I shook my head and continued right out the door.

"Ira?" Irfan said, coming out after me. "What happened? Are you okay? He didn't-"

"No, nothing like that," I turned and shoved my hair back. "Just get in the car."

We weren't even out of the parking lot when he started again. "Tell me what happened," Irfan turned in his seat to look at me.

"Buckle your seatbelt," I commanded, not even taking my eyes off the road.

"I will, if you tell me what he said," his eyes bore into the side of my face.

"Fine," I snapped, "just buckle your seatbelt already."

I heard it snap into place and Irfan grumbled. "Happy now, mom?"

"Very," I said.

A few seconds of silence passed and then, "Don't make me pull it out of you."

I came to a stop at a red light and glanced at Irfan . "He scares me."

Irfan opened his mouth to say something but I put a hand up to stop him.

"No- not like that." I floundered for the right words. "He sees more than any other person I've ever met. He sees me. He sees my pain, even though I try to bury it down deep."

Irfan sat back in his seat and clicked his tongue. "It sounds to me, like you've met your match."

I laughed. "Yeah, well, I think there's more to Riaan than I can even begin to imagine."

"You mean?"

"He's been hurt too. By what, I don't know," I said softly, and ran my fingers through my hair. "But he... understands me."

"Well," Irfan said, putting the sun visor down, "maybe you should give the guy a chance... as friends."

"I don't know," I shook my head. "I'm afraid that being friends with him will lead to something else, and I don't think I can give my heart to someone."

"Ira," Irfan said with a huff, "I'm not asking you to jump in the bed with the dude. I'm asking you to give him a chance to prove himself to you. He seems like a nice guy and Ira... you really need to learn to live. You need to open yourself up."

"I'll talk to him... okay?"

Irfan grinned from ear to ear. "I love you, Ira baby. I promise you, everything will get better. Each day, the pain will get less and less, as long as you're willing to let it go. Do you hear me,Ira? Let the pain go."

I laughed and pulled in front of Irfan's hostel. "You're starting to sound like Dr. Nandini."

"I guess that means you better listen to me," he leaned over and kissed my cheek. I tried not to flinch, telling myself, 'This is Irfan'.

Irfan noticed my small movement and gave me a sad look. "You're never going to be the old Ira, I know that. But I know you can find some part of yourself again."

He opened the car door and ran inside the building.

I sat there for a moment.

Could I pick up the pieces of my shattered life or were the pieces too small to ever be found again?

     

                                   ~

I had just walked into my apartment when my phone beeped. I pulled it out of my purse and read the text. It was from Anusha.