Chapter 41: Welcome to Lovely Ladies
It felt like days. I been locked up in my room. Just crying my eyes out night and day. I haven't spoken or seen dad since it all went down. I just cry while in my bed with Marshmallow. Colleen tries convincing me to come downstairs but I ignore her. I haven't seen Christopher either. I haven't seen anyone. I'm just isolating while I cry myself to death.
It's Tuesday. Christopher leaves in two days. And I am only crying because I can't ever talk to him or be alone with him again. Nothing is ever gonna be the same. I had just cried into my pillow and I had been reading different books at once. I just cried unlike anything. And I just loved having to reminisce everything in my head. From the first moment I met Christopher up until we were torn apart. And now I see why mom couldn't stand dad. I guess it all makes sense now.
Morning had come around so easily. And with no surprise, Colleen knocked on my door. I didn't listen to anything she said. I just cried for days to want my mother by my side while I cry. And I just cried like a baby because that is basically all I have in me. I didn't waste my time to actually just get dressed up for no reason. I turned my record player on. I put on my makeup and then I dressed up in a strapless light blue sundress. I even faked a smile.
If you hide away then it's only going to get worse. Wear your heart on your sleeve.
And then I thought. What would Mandy do? If she were in this position what would she do? And I knew exactly what she'd do. And so I pretended nothing bothered me. So I had taken my time out of my room with my hair and makeup done. I faked a smile and I was just about ready to walk down the stairs.
"Emma, I need to talk to you." Christopher gently took my arm.
"NO." My dad was at the bottom of the stairs. "Five feet apart. Remember? Five feet apart."
Fuck.
He's never gonna let us be alone again is he? So I felt miserable. And I just continued to walk downstairs. Dad tried embracing me with open arms but I ignored him, walking past him. I went into the kitchen and I started to grab myself a plate and I had some of Colleen's pancakes she made. I took a cup of coffee for myself and I sat down at the table, just feeling miserable.
I couldn't stop but to notice how Christopher adored me. He looked at me. And under the pressure of being unable to talk to each other he thought I was beautiful. I could tell by the look on his face. While we all sat at the table. Colleen and dad were the only ones eating. I didn't have an appetite. I was too stressed that I didn't have an appetite. And I just couldn't exactly tolerate even sitting here. I'm on the opposite side of Christopher. He's across from me and dad on my left at the head of the table and Colleen is on my right at the other head of the table.
The table has awkward silence. Dad tried starting a conversation. But I just acted like what he said was nothing so I didn't acknowledge him. And he knew I was resentful towards him about the entire situation that happened. And he just ruined everything. My dad has a problem with destroying happiness. And I just can't believe I'm sitting here.
"Emma, Colleen and I have decided that we want you to see Dr. Whitemore." Dad announced like it was an invitation. And that I'd be proud.
Colleen smiled at me lightly. There's no help with her. She's just dad's trophy wife. She just stands or sits there...agrees to anything he says or does. And she keeps trying to convince me that loving Christopher isn't worth ruining and destroying my family. But he is the one destroying the family.
The fact that he wants me to see his own fucking therapist. For what? I just wanted to scream and yell at him. I needed to calm myself down. I wasn't going to lose my mind. Not yet. I am going to make myself just relax and try my hardest to just listen and then say whatever I please to him.
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Mine {Book 1}| Completed
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