The Assassin's Leman

Saddest Lullaby

The Knowles' Ranch

Every night my heart sunk, but it was the part of the day I rushed to. To see the face of my love plastered upon our children that hadn't had the privilege of meeting her consciously. It wasn't coincidental that she'd dominated within their gene pool.

I prayed to God every night of her pregnancy that our babies would take Onika's beauty, and thankfully my prayers were answered tenfold.

"Ma," Beaux rasped out, scratching his stitches right beneath his hairline.

Beaux, alternative for B.O; Bennett Onyx, my second twin who had hair jet black just as Onika's and eyes the same shape as her.

Her twin.

"Yeah, Beaux?" I sat down on his side of the bed, carefully watching his legs that were sprouting as time went. My boys had taken my structure of build, they were going to be some tall men.

"When is it going to be time for me to get these stitches out? Bry keeps saying I'm never going to!"

I bit back a chuckle and gently pulled his burnt caramel skin away from the stitched skin. "You just got 'em in a week ago, B. You gotta give it time, ight?" I softly pushed his curls away from his face, placing a sweet kiss right upon his forehead before getting up to tend to my oldest twin.

"Ight, mama!" Beaux yawned, turning his lamp off before turning on his left side for a night's slumber.

"Is that lady coming over?" Bryce asked, peeking from behind his book. His deep brown eyes shone into my soul, daring me to lie or faux confusion.

I licked my dried lips. There was a sudden itch at the tip of my nose—a sign that stress was near.

Lying wasn't prohibited within any four walls I owned, it wasn't allowed anywhere near me in any sense of matter. But, when it came to explaining to my children the truth behind everything, I had the urge to spit folktales to them. I couldn't place the correct words together without painting the picture of me being a coward.

That's what I deemed myself as after my marriage anyway.

"What're you reading?" I weakly dismissed, pushing the attention to his book of the week.

Tearing his eyes away from me, his cheeks rose while answering my question, not forgetting an ounce of detail either.

"So happy y'all are into school, I hated school as a kid, BJ."

I admitted, bending down to his height so I could kiss him goodnight. After talking a mile a minute about his deep interest on the chapter book, sleep welcomed itself into his body.

My heart screamed against my chest, there was so much agony and regret eating at my soul. The fresh produce I consumed daily wouldn't be enough to keep me alive, I'm sure the pot holes of darkness would eat at my soul before time would.

Exiting the navy-walled room, I nearly sobbed at my son's rightful and accurate accusation of "the lady" coming over.

My hideaway ranch.

Deep in the rural areas of northern Texas. So far away from civilization that technology stood no chance. It was a getaway from the crazy life I lived, though it served to my son's as our "fun vocational home with the large pool and land toys".