Date Her Instead Vol. 2

Chapter Five: The Fight

When Haruna got home that night, it was past 11:30 p.m. Silently, she snuck inside her house and slipped off her shoes. Her parents had known she was going to be out, and considering she was going to be in the care of the Nakatomi's, they were perfectly fine with Haruna being out late. Regardless, that didn't mean she could come in and make a bunch of noise. So, as quietly as she could, Haruna made her way up the stairs and into her room.

When she got there, she quickly went through her routine. Haruna changed out of her uniform into her version of pajamas, brushed her teeth and then went straight to bed. She knew she'd have to face her past very shortly, but Haruna decided tonight was definitely not the time as she swiftly fell asleep.

The next morning, she awoke to the sound of birds chirping loudly outside of her window. "Ugh, shut up..." Haruna whined. But of course, they didn't. In fact, they seemed to get louder. Looking at the time on her phone, Haruna saw it was 8:00 a.m. "I just wanna sleep more..." she moaned, but her complaints were ignored. Knowing it was useless, Haruna gave up and got out of bed.

When she went to step on the floor, Haruna felt something stab her foot. "OW!" she yelped, looking to see what it was. Picking up the item in question, Haruna saw it was a broken phone strap. It had once been whole, and it was something she had bought with Kanako not too long before their friendship ended. In letters beginning to fade, it still read "END" where it had snapped in half.

Haruna stared at the piece of plastic in her hand. For a while, she thought nothing, simply keeping her eyes on those three letters and reading it over and over. Finally, something came to mind. It was a thought that Haruna was pretty sure had never crossed her mind before, but with how conflicted her heart had become, a certain question was forced to the front of it. "...Why did it have to end?"

That question was one Haruna had always avoided. Part of her reason had been that she was just trying to forget about Kanako and all the time she had spent with her, but the other part was because Haruna felt like it was pointless to try and come up with an answer. Of course, Haruna felt that way because she was fairly certain that even if she did try, she probably wouldn't be able to find it.

Not finding answers turned out to be the theme of the weekend. Over and over Haruna went through moments in her head. The moment she realized she was in love with Akio. The time she had spent with him. The deal he had made, making Haruna confront her past even if she didn't want to. Then, there were the moments with Kanako. At first, there had been so much yelling and arguing, but now...

"It's like my outside and inside are out of sync..." Haruna sighed. It was true the amount of fights the two girls had been getting into had gone down, but there were still times when Haruna said something she knew she shouldn't have and it would make Kanako upset. "I used to never even care about how she felt," Haruna thought. "So how come I do now? Why do I feel guilty when I hurt her? Why... does my heart race every time I'm near her? Why do I find myself looking forward to seeing her?"

"Feelings like those are ones a person should be able to enjoy... so why can't I?"

Question after question flew through Haruna's mind. Continuously they went by, each one going unanswered. Haruna had a feeling that she might get some answers if she finally would look back on her past, but she was afraid to. Haruna was afraid of what it would mean for her and how it would change her relationship with Kanako. But when your past catches up to you, it will wait no longer, and for Haruna, it was as if hers loomed over her heart, casting its shadows of doubt and regret.

Not having to worry about anyone hearing her, Haruna screamed.

If there was any singular way to sum up her feelings, it was like all of them had been tied together in a neat bow of frustration. "I don't... get it..." Haruna said quietly as she dropped to her knees in the living room. Her landing let out a loud thud, but no one else was home. The noise echoed in Haruna's ears and she began to feel tears forming in her eyes. There was so much emotion storming inside of her that she didn't understand it. So many questions and no answers and now haunting guilt and pain were being piled on top of it. Nothing seemed to make sense. However, there was one thing Haruna was sure of. One absolute truth she believed. "It really was... all my fault..."