Let it Rain ( BTS' Kim Namjoon fanfiction )

The Cold Night

I quietly tiptoed to the kitchen . Aunt was assembling food in the table . We had a strict rule of eating together in our house , so I gently sat down on my usual chair . She was silent , which was her usual composure . I was praying so deeply inside my mind for her not notice my scarf . She assembled the food in my plate and sat across me . For a long time there was no other sound but the munching of food.

" So , Mr Harvey called me today .."

My spoon stopped midway in the air . I didn't wanted to eat no more . I wanted to dig a burrow in this very ground and hide inside .

I gently raised my eyes from my plate to look at her . Her chocolate eyes were staring onto my ocean ones. I felt so little under it . I felt like I was going to burn .

" Maths tests were a bit difficult and I was .. "

" STOP RIGHT THERE " her sudden loud voice made my heart stop . " TEST WAS DIFFICULT DOES NOT MEAN THAT YOU SHOULD FAIL . I GIVE YOU EVERYTHING YOU WANT AND YOU ARE MAKING USE OF NOTHING . YOU SPEND YOUR TIME IN SCHOOL SINGING ? WHY CAN'T YOU JUST STUDY ? WHY CANT YOU JUST TRY ? WHY CAN'T YOU ATLEAST DO THAT FOR YOUR PARENTS ? "

Her loud voice echoed from the walls . My eyes started getting blurry and my breath heavier as I tried to hold back my tears that were threatening to fall any moment .

" HOW THE HELL ARE YOU GONNA GET A DECENT JOB AND LEAD A NORMAL LIFE LIKE OTHERS ? ALL YOU WANNA DO IS SING THE CRAP OUT OF YOUR LUNGS AND WRITE MUSIC . WHY CAN'T YOU BE LIKE NORMAL CHILD AND DO WHAT'S BEST FOR YOU ? "

" but my wish is to perform.... "

" SCREW YOUR WISHES " her voice was ten times louder . " THIS IS MY HOUSE AND I SAY WHAT HAS TO BE DONE HERE . YOU HAVE NO VOICE HERE "

hot tears started rolling down my cheeks . She stared at me and her eyes didn't regretted a single word she said .

" I didn't ask you to take care of me you did so because YOU WANTED MY FUCKING MONEY AND PROPERTY " I finally shouted back as I found my voice and her expression changed as if she was stabbed with a knife .

" What did you say ? " she asked unable to believe what I just said .

" I SAID YOU WANTED MY FUCKING MONEY . YOU SHOULD'VE KILLED ME ALONG WITH MY PARENTS SO THAT YOU COULD HAVE IT ALL WITHOUT ANY OBSTACLE.... "

I couldn't finish as her hand landed harshly on my right cheek . My hands went to my cheek which was stinging out of the sudden hit . I looked up and she had a fierce look in her face . For the first time in my life I was scared of her . For the first time in my life I believed what others said , she killed my parents .

" Never dare to say that again " she hissed .

" I do believe it Olivia " I said before running to my room and slamming the door shut .

I shut the door and stood there for a long time . Tears were flowing out of my eyes and I was sobbing uncontrollably . I slid to the ground and sat there crying my eyes out until there was no more tears left to cry .

" I miss you Momma , I miss you Papa , I want you back " I whispered to myself in a shaky rasp voice in between my tears .

to be continued.....