She [H.S]

Chapter One

I breathe in another suffocating breath as I look around the coffee shop, praying for some sort of release from the mess in front of me. The flickering line on the laptop reminds me of the multiple times I've tapped furiously on the keyboard, only to erase the pointless train of thought. Writer's block is a mess. It's hitting me hard today, something that is showing through the now permanent frown lines on my forehead.

The lukewarm hot chocolate sits in front of me- a memoir of the many times I have found myself sat here trying to unwind from the stress of attempting to chase the ideas that always seem to run away from me. It's here, at the Mont Le Grand cafe in an alley in the middle of Berkshire that I catch up to those ideas, leading to an endless flow of creativity that ties me over and completes the work.

This time is different. Something is blocking the flow of ideas, leaving me in desperation as I look around the cramped dining area for some sort of relief or thought. The grey skies outside of the window leave little to the imagination- it's about to rain heavily and it's pathetic fallacy, mirroring the crap mood that is seeping through every pore of my body.

I sigh, leaning against the back of the armchair that I have been sat in for the past three hours. Seeing the time, I stretch out my legs and begin to roll my neck to relieve myself of the upcoming cramps from hunching over and staring at the small screen. I make sure my laptop is safe inside my rucksack and the strewn bits of paper that are stained with a mixture of colourful pens and dead-end ideas are carelessly thrown in.

I place the cup and saucer on the side of the counter, leaving a small smile of gratitude to Emelia, the main waitress of the small cafe. "I'll see you later" she waves, her thin hands coming off of the broom she was sweeping with. I manage to say a quick farewell before opening the door, grunting as I use an excess of force. This brought in a gust of wind that shot through my coat and jacket, making goosebumps rise ever so quickly on my skin as my body shakes. Sighing, I step out into the rain.

My feet splash against the stone of the pavement, making small droplets of water shoot up around my ankles. I couldn't care less- I just needed to get home, shower and then change into pyjamas, ready for another movie night with Reign. Maybe it could be another rerun of Jurassic Park? That seems to be our go-to whenever we have the time to spend with one another.

It isn't long until I see the top of the road and stare down at the row of houses. I start jogging lightly till I reach the familiar yellow door that looks dull against the current harsh thrash of rain. My trembling fingers find the key automatically and shove it into the lock, twisting it.

I open the door and then proceed to slam it shut with such hurry- pausing on the doormat and dropping my bag to the floor. I begin to heavily pant as I try and regain some sort of body heat.

"Bloody hell it's like you were being chased by an axe murderer!" Reign peeks her head out from the living room door, her eyes as wide as dinner plates. I breathe out a chuckle, cringing as I peel the watermelon printed coat and my now soaked jacket from my body.

"It was honestly like the man upstairs was trying to punish me for something." I raise my voice slightly as I place my jacket into the tumble dryer on a quick spin, my coat onto a hook and then I finally put a new t-shirt on, sighing with relief to have dry clothes on. I grab a bowl of fruit salad from the island, grateful that Reign made it for me.

"So did you get anything done?" Reign looks up as I walk into the living room, sitting on the edge of the sofa with my legs crossed. I chew on a grape, shaking my head. This makes Reign look at me- sympathy clear in her eyes.

I hate sympathy. It makes me seem weak, vulnerable almost. If one person gives you sympathy, everyone around you suddenly looks at you like you're about to break all the time. It's all people have given me ever since him, and I don't like it. I'm not that "kicked puppy" anymore.

"Lou, you haven't written anything at home and you didn't write anything at Mont's?!" Shock is evident in her voice, almost in disbelief that a magical idea hasn't come to me.

Believe me, I'm just as shocked as she is.

"No, I don't know why. This hasn't happened in like three months" I groan, pushing around the melon in the bowl. I'm embarrassed and out of options to bring ideas onto the pages of my work. My hand reaches to the top of my scalp and I grimace as I feel the knotty hairstyle the wind gave me.

"I think I have an idea that you might like, it'll take your mind off of this mess" Reign gestures to me, earning a scoff from my mouth as I look at her fully. Reign has a purple pixie cut, almost the complete opposite of my long frizzy dark blonde hair. Her eyes are outlined with a nice layer of eyeliner that makes her eyes look softer, matching her charming and enchanting personality that fights through the thick London accent she has.

"Reign, as much as I love you, I am not going to be going to the pub with you to 'just play pool' and end up with a massive hangover and a bloke in my bed" I roll my eyes, feeling sick at the memory. It wasn't my fault that she kicked him out after they did the deed and he then snuck into my room looking for comfort. It just scared me when I found him attached to my side in the morning after I wasn't the one to bring him home. It did earn him a lovely yellow bruise though.

Yellow's my favourite colour.

"Nooo" She draws out, placing down her fruit salad bowl, her bare feet now on the carpet. "I promise, this is a legitimate fun party for a friend, almost like a launch thing. It's for work, and I can have a plus one. I want you there." She beams, almost being overdramatic just so I say yes.

I stare at her intently, looking for any trace of falsehood in her eyes- to which I see none. I huff out in agreement, earning a squeal from Reign. I place a finger in the air to silence her. "Only if I get to choose my outfit" I stand up, taking both bowls to the kitchen side and leave them for later. I turn around and walk back to the hallway, leaning against the wall.

"Fine. But you have like..." She checks her watch "an hour. Let's go!" She claps her hands, to which I respond by walking up the stairs into my room. It's tidy in here, apart from the odd item of clothing on the floor from this morning. Picking them up and chucking them into my hamper, I head to my wardrobe and chuck open the doors to frown at the little collection I own. I really need to shop for some more clothes- it's embarrassing.

Do I need to be casual, or formal?

I sigh, deciding to grab my large knitted cardigan from the hanger. It's one of my favourites- it has these different patches of colour all around it, almost like I took a bunch of random knitted squares from my nana and just sewed them together. It screams originality, something that's hard to come by recently.

I settle for some high rise flare jeans and a white t-shirt, knowing that the cardigan would be my pop of colour for this outfit. My hair is teased for volume and put into a ponytail, a white scrunchie surrounding the hairband. Basic, I know, but it serves its purpose well here. Checking myself out in the mirror, I smile and nod curtly at my appearance- opening my door and jogging down the stairs.

I stare at the shoes on the shoe rack for far too long, eyeing the chunky boots and the trainers.

"They're not going to magically be put on your feet you know" a soft whisper hits my ear and I yelp, placing a hand against my chest in horror as I step away from the sound.

"Jeez Rey!" My voice cracks, a wheeze making it past my lips as I regain my breath. She does nothing to soothe me, only giggles and points to the chunky brown boots.

She's lucky I like her.

I grab the shoes and sit on the stairs, straining to pull them on, my tongue peeking from my lips. Grunts and other ungodly sounds fall from my lips, turning into squeals of excitement once each one is zipped up.

I stand up, dusting myself off with sighs of contentment, looking at Reign whilst her eyes show great concern yet adoration for my outfit. "Oh please, are we going or what?" I smile, grabbing her wrist to drag her towards the front door. "It's party time!"

First chapter how we feeling?!
This is pretty crap- apologies!
  kitty x