Ill-Fated Calf-Love

Kuroo

His thoughts kept circling back to that first game, his first kiss with Akaashi. For once, Akaashi hadn't shied from the eyes watching him, instead kissing Kuroo back with such passion Kuroo had been left light-headed and dizzy. They'd shared several kisses after that first one, but in private. Akaashi let him kiss him only on the cheek in front of their friends, but it was Akaashi who stole kisses when they went on dates, Akaashi who always caught and held his hand when they walked together, Akaashi who found the courage to curl up on Kuroo's lap and hold him when he was terrified of thunderstorms or stressing over mid-terms.

Kuroo's whole life had become about Akaashi and football, and he was okay with that.

They talked every night over fall break while Akaashi was away at his grandparents again and sometimes he would call just to tell Akaashi goodnight even if they had spent the whole day together. Talking to Akaashi had become like air to Kuroo. Kuroo needed him to live, to breathe.

Before he knew it, they were back in school, his birthday passed - without incident this time - and they threw a proper party for Akaashi. Winter break came and went, followed by spring break. Finals were approaching, bringing with them Kuroo's graduation and his impending goodbye to Akaashi as he would go off to high school while Akaashi still had another year before he could join him.

Oikawa and Iwaizumi rejoiced in the news that they had both been accpeted into the elite private school, Aoba Johsai, while Kuroo and Yaku were to attend the powerhouse, Nekoma.

They scraped their way through finals, registered for high school classes, then the four of them were graduating.

Kuroo wanted to spend as much of the summer as he could with Akaashi, but his parents had planned another out of country trip that stole a month and a half of his summer. Kuroo only had internet at the hotel and his family was determined to spend as little time there as possible. Other than interspersed messages, Kuroo talked to Akaashi no more than five times while he was away.

He though he'd see Akaashi when he returned, but Akaashi's mom had won a trip through her work for a week stay at a resort, all-expenses paid and family included. By the time Akaashi returned, he and Kuroo had only a week to spend together before the school year started.

They'd been cuddled together on Kuroo's bed that final day, watching a movie while Kuroo's parents were at work.

"Kuroo, I..." Akaashi trailed off, shifting to look up at him with unshed tears in his eyes.

"I love you, too, Akaashi." He'd blurted the words automatically, the words that had been floating around his head since winter break.

Akaashi's smile was sad, tears spilling over to run down his cheeks. "Yeah." Then he'd kissed Kuroo and they'd lost themselves in the moment.

He should have realized it then, but he didn't. It his Kuroo later, long after Akaashi had left while he was getting ready for bed. Akaashi hadn't been about to confess his love.

Akaashi had been about to break up with Kuroo.