Ｗ♢ＲＴＨＬΞＳＳ [Suicidal Deku & Baku]

Chapter 3: Stained skin.

This chapter contains
Cutting.
And
Angst. (Duh.)

Journal entry. (When I write on paper I tend to add "..." But I don't think that's normal?)
I woke up in the hospital, I don't remember anything. Shoto didn't seem to know either. But he was crying I think he truly cares? Apparently he started using his fire? Also I think I saved Kacchan? I remember seeing his beautiful eyes.. And then it's blank. God I wish he loved me back. The more I try the more it hurts me.

I've know I got to tell him maybe then it will all stop? The pain im enduring inside? Maybe he'll stop? Maybe we c-

A tear dripped down my face and smudged the ink. It's really visible great..

It doesn't matter. I'll build up the courage one day.

-
I still have that damn bruised purple ribs and it still hurts.

It's been a week, I still have no quirk. I keep trying but nothing happens, so worthless... Stupid quirks. Schools over now at least. so I can stop worrying about people testing their quirks on me!

I've been training my body for the exam! I'll become a hero! I don't care what others think nothing will stop me!

-

I made it to the exam and ran into kacchan! He didn't actually hurt me? Yet? We sat next to each other in the exam briefing and a blue-haired boy pointed me out and the teachers wouldn't let me into the exam! I...

I worked so God damn hard for this and I can't even do it. Kacchan had a smirk on his face, he knew this would happen..

I cried myself to sleep, weeks past and I got a letter from UA? I ripped it open and it was an apology, I'd barely call it that though.. they didn't think I could do it... What made it worse was its all might who said it.

He had a smile the whole time.. How could he break my dream with a smile planted on his face? He ended the message with an invitation to general course.. I guess I should accept it... It's still a prestige school at least.

I decided to stop writing in my book for now.

It's easier to keep a note of how shitty everything is. How do people cope?

I'm outside Ua. For real. To get an education so I can get a job I don't even want.

God my life sucks.
Im in 1-C, I hope they're some decent people at least it can't be worse than those people in middle school right?

Right?

I walked past 1A and wondered if they're was ever a chance for me to be in it.

I kept doubting myself.. I mean all might said I couldn't.

I'm useless.

I am 'Deku' after all.

Roaming the halls passing my dream, I made it to class 1C a gigantic door? Mutant Quirks maybe?

I opened it up, a fresh start...

Nobody looked down on me yet.

"Oh shit! Its Deku!" One of kacchan's friends from middle school shouted while the new person next to him snickered. His friend?

"Yeah! It is! No way. I mean we knew he wouldn't make it to be a hero, but for him to actually stay in UA? Why would they want a quirkless here?" The other one of katsuki's friends said.

Both of them are here... I.. How... Why does life hate me?

I went to a spare seat. And sat down with my head nuzzled into my elbow