Fated To Love You

Tears

The following day, Ih Na woke up with a ton of mixed emotions. She was happy to know that Rae Won loved her, but embarrassed and most of all, frustrated with herself for allowing something like this to happen so soon.

After hearing Yong Hwa's hurtful words last night, Ih Na knew that she needed affirmation and comfort. She needed to hear that someone loved her, which was why she had visited Rae Won on impulse and asked him a question that should've been saved for much later.

Ih Na allowed her vulnerability to get the best out of her, and now, she had no other choice but to deal with the consequences of her actions.

As Ih Na sat up, gently pressing the comforter against her chest, she couldn't help but sigh. Ih Na knew that she had feelings for Rae Won, but that it was too early for them to even consider being in a relationship or anything close to that. She had just broken up with her boyfriend, and the fact that she was "hooking up" with him now, just didn't feel right.

If her family, friends and co-workers knew about this, she would be looked down upon, and Ih Na wasn't ready for that kind of treatment.

Just as she was about to drown in her thoughts, Ih Na felt Rae Won awaken from his slumber. He slowly sat up, planted a soft kiss on her shoulder, then gently rested his chin on it.

"Good morning." Rae Won greeted with his deep morning voice.

"Good morning." Ih Na replied with a faint smile.

She didn't know how she was going to tell him about the negative thoughts that ate her up inside, but she knew that she had to.

Allowing something very intimate to happen between the both of them last night was bad enough, but to continually lead him on when she knew that she wasn't completely ready for a relationship yet was even worse.

Even if it hurt, Ih Na knew that she had to do what was best for them in the given situation.

"During breakfast." She thought as they continued to sit and cuddle there in silence.

Rae Won treated Ih Na so well that morning, that the task of telling him the truth was so difficult for her to do.

Rae Won did everything in the kitchen, from the cooking to the cleaning, and all Ih Na had to do was to sit back and relax. He seemed like the perfect boyfriend, the perfect husband even, and she felt so bad for having to break his heart like this.

"Rae Won ah," She began. "Jeongmal... mianheyo (I'm... really sorry)."

Rae Won looked at her with a confused expression on his face.

"Mwo ttaemune (What for)?" He asked, slowly taking the seat right across her.

"Last night... it was a mistake." Ih Na said, the words struggling to leave her mouth. "I shouldn't have come here. I shouldn't have asked you if you loved me. I shouldn't have allowed things to go this far."

"I don't understand." Rae Won uttered, evidently hurt at what he was hearing. "Ih Na, is there something wrong? You know you can tell me anything right?"

Suddenly, tears fell out of Ih Na's eyes.

"Rae Won, I like you. I like you so much." She admitted. "In you, I found a person who genuinely cared for me. I found someone I could laugh with, be my truest self with, and even someone... I could grow old with. But I just realized that the timing of everything... it's really off. I'd just gotten out of a relationship, and now I'm jumping into something that seems like one, and... I'm just not ready." She added.

"I know you understand. Those were your words at Naksan Park. But... I don't want to be unfair to you, Rae Won." Ih Na said. "I know how selfless you are, and how you're willing to accept whatever I can give to you, but right now, I'm still a mess, Rae Won. I still feel so broken, so incomplete deep inside, and I can't commit myself to you if I still feel that way."

"In as much as I've appreciated all your efforts to help me move forward, I feel as if now is the time for me to find myself and to really heal on my own." Ih Na uttered. "I need to come into terms with the fact that I wasted seven years of my life on a guy who simply used me. Because after all this time, I realized that it still hurts a lot." She added with tears rolling down her cheeks.

"I know that I like you, Rae Won, but you deserve to be liked, most especially loved, wholeheartedly. A good man like you deserves that." Ih Na said as she held his hand from across the table. "I'm so lucky to have met someone like you, and the past two weeks we spent together were the best two weeks of my life. But I guess there's nothing else left for me to do but to say goodbye."

"I need to find myself, Rae Won. I need to be in a better place before I see you again."

Rae Won understood Ih Na. He always did; even if it saddened and tore him apart. He knew this was going to happen, and though he had wanted her to stay, he knew that this was the right thing to do.

"After what happened with Yoo Mi, I thought I would never fall in love again." Rae Won said as he looked at their intertwined hands. "But then, I met you and everything changed. From the moment I first saw you, I knew you were something else." He added.

"I had no intention of falling for you, but it just happened, and now we find ourselves in this very moment where you have to leave and I can't ask you to stay, and though I want to tell you that it doesn't hurt, I can't because it really does." Rae Won admitted with watery eyes. "But then, it was my choice to fall for you. I took the risk, and I will never ever regret it."

"Ih Na, take all the time that you need." He uttered as he gently wiped her tears away. "We may not know what the future holds, but if we're really meant to be together, we will be together. But if we were simply meant to pass each other by, it was really nice meeting you."

"Rae Won..."

"But I'll continue to pray sincerely, fervently and wholeheartedly that you can find your way back to me." Rae Won said.

"Saranghaeyo (I love you)." He uttered, planting one last kiss on Ih Na's lips.

Indeed, this was goodbye.