relapse

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on the days that i fall into the abyss of myself, 

my skin tears at the friction of regret. 

self-doubt swallows me like the chalky, powdery dust 

of so many pills,

taken by the handful in an effort to be full again. 


anxiety has written so many poems 

on the inside of my chest 

in the form of tally marks 

counting down the minutes 

until i can breathe again. 


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