Stumbling Backward(JOOKYUN✔️)

backward

Im Changkyun follows his older brother outside, the bell tinkling above his head just before the high noon sun can wash over his face. Changwoo is just a step or so ahead of him, only just out of arm's reach. If he had the courage in him, Changkyun would push his brother into the busy traffic just a metre ahead of them. But somehow, though he knows the man before him killed their parents, he can't find the ability to even speak up anymore.

Changkyun feels trapped on this busy street, unable to ask for help, unable to attract a gaze. Changwoo has pulled the hood of his jacket up over his face, so even if anybody did glance their way, they would no longer see his surely recognizable face. It has been plastered all over the news for the last thirty-six hours, after all.

The pair approach a car only a few storefronts due East of the Precious Paws, a rather nondescript beige midsize. This should have been the car the police sat outside my apartment, Changkyun thinks to himself as Changwoo removes a key fob from his pocket. Turning himself around, the older faces the younger with a bright smile, almost as if he's surprised to see that Changkyun has followed him this far from the safety of his workplace.

Almost smirking to himself, Changwoo deduces exactly why that must be. "Your little toy seems pretty important to you," he states with confidence dripping from his tone.

Changkyun doesn't understand that, but after a moment's thought, he assumes the older is speaking about Jooheon. So he only nods, not trusting himself to speak without a waver to his voice. He does not feel strong anymore, not as he had before he'd seen his brother's face. Or when he finally came to realize that he is in love with someone. He feels weak, and young. So young, all over again. 

He feels so stupid for believing that he would really be safe out in the open. Without some sort of police protection. Without Jooheon.

"I only have one thing I need you to do," Changwoo informs his younger brother with a more placid expression now. Changkyun isn't sure when the smile fell, maybe between just the distance of one blink to the next, but it's long gone. "But I want to talk first."

Changkyun is uncomfortable standing in nearly the center of the pathway, pairs and groups parting to walk around him, between he and his brother at times. And yet he does not want to take any step closer to Changwoo. Not yet anyway. He instead shoves his hands deep into his pockets, taking a subtle glance around at the passerby to try and garner their attention.

None of them look his way.

"What do you wanna talk about?" He wonders aloud, letting his gaze trace itself back to his brother's face. He doesn't want to seem distracted, knowing his brother never took kindly to being ignored when they were younger. He makes eye contact, the best he's made in years he believes, and holds it. "And what do you want me to do?"

"We'll get to that. For now, hop into the car so we can have a chat." Changwoo clicks the unlock button on his fob and slides into the passenger seat, leaving the driver's seat empty for the younger. The seat unsettles Changkyun, but he rounds the car anyhow and sidles in. He doesn't want to keep the elder waiting, knowing every moment Changkyun disobeys is a moment that could bring harm to the blonde across the city at work.

"What are we talking about?" Changkyun questions when he slams the car door shut beside him, blocking out most of the noise from the busy street outside. The windows are quite tinted from the outside, and he figures nobody can see through them into the interior where they now sit. If he felt trapped outside, he's most definitely trapped inside. Stupid, he thinks with a frown.

"I want to tell you why I did it. Why I killed Mom and Dad."

Bile rises in Changkyun's throat as the words leave his brother's lips, staining the air and bleeding black against the rift that already lies between them. Wanting to slap his hands over his ears in fright, Changkyun forces his eyes to remain staring hard at the steering wheel before him. This isn't right. He shouldn't be here. His brother shouldn't be here.