The Next Death

Chapter 13

"You do know the meaning of the word 'relax,' don't you?" Sam asks.

I open my eyes to glare at him. "Of course, I do."

"Then relax."

I shut my eyes again. "I am relaxed."

"I've never seen a relaxed person look so tense."

"I'm not tense!" I snap. Sam doesn't respond. I sigh, sitting up. Looking over, I find him giving me a look, one eyebrow arched. "Okay, maybe I am a little tense. It has nothing to do with the training though. All my classes have tests tomorrow. I know I shouldn't be worried about them, but I always get nervous before tests."

Sam nods. "Let's try something different then." He sits down in front of me. "I want you to meditate, but don't think about anything. I don't want you to count your breaths either. Instead, as you inhale, think 'inhale' and as you exhale, think 'exhale.' Nothing else."

I take a deep breath, slowly exhaling while I close my eyes and straighten my back. I let my breath flow.

Inhale. Exhale.

Inhale.

Exhale.

"Good, now, keep breathing but stop thinking. Don't hold onto the words I'm saying. Let them pass through your mind as the air through your lungs. I want you to imagine yourself lifting your arm. See it rising into the air above your head. Imagine it flowing down to extend out to your side. Now imagine doing the same with your other arm. Good. Now envision yourself placing your hands on the ground, using them to push yourself up off the ground. Take a step forward. Turn around and tilt your head down. Keep your mind clear. No thoughts, no emotion. Now open your eyes."

I let my eyes drift open. I don't see Sam though. I'm staring down at myself. My legs are still crossed, but I'm laying down. My arms lay limply next to me.

Sam walks into my view and I turn my head to look at him. I open my mouth to ask him something, but no sound comes out.

Sam holds up a hand. "No. No thoughts. Just exist. You've managed to astral project." He looks down at my body lying on the floor. "There is still much fine-tuning to be done, but first, you have to get a feel for this. If you can remember how it feels, you'll be able to astral project with much less difficulty. Not to mention you also need to learn to split your conscious, so you don't look dead."

I turn my attention back to my body. That's when I note that my chest isn't rising and falling. I move closer. Perhaps I was just too far away.

"No. You're not breathing," Sam confirms. "I was hoping I would be able to get you to split your conscious on the first go, but" he shrugs, "That's why I'm here."

I feel a tug and my head turns to the door. What was that? Was that the Flow? I look towards Sam. He doesn't seem to have felt it.

Eliza

My name reverberates through me, and I know if I wasn't astral projecting, it would have been a shiver down my spine. That voice was my grandmother's. I can feel her presence. As if she were in the room. I slowly turn in a circle. Where was this feeling coming from? It was distant, yet so close.

I begin to walk around the room. Perhaps I could find somewhere where the feeling would be stronger.

I can feel Sam's eyes on me. I try to speak again with the same result. It frustrates me, but I keep my focus. I could ask him after even though I wish I could ask him now.

I freeze. If I was breathing, I would have stopped. I had walked into a bubble of cold. How could I be cold? I didn't have a body.

I want to move, but I can't. Black was seeping into my vision. I could feel anger and rage-- mind-crushing rage. The kind that makes people do unspeakable things. More than that- I can feel a consciousness buried in the cold darkness.

As if realizing I can feel it, that consciousness begins unfurling. It's studying me as I study it. I can feel a flicker of realization- an understanding it had towards me. It's reaching for me, trying to pull me closer to it.

I don't know what to make of this cold darkness filled with rage, but I do know one thing: being near it is a bad thing. I need to get away. Far away.

I step back. It pulls harder. Where was Sam? I needed to end this experience. I spin around, but I don't see Sam. In fact, I don't see anything.

"Eliza?" Sam's voice floats across the air. It sounds so far away.

I move towards his voice reaching out. I wish I could speak.

"Eliza, is something wrong?" Sam's voice is closer. I feel a hand touch my arm followed by a sharp intake of breath.

Another hand claims my other arm and together, they pull me forward. I let them guide me. We stop and the hands release my arms. My hands dart out, reaching for the connection again. Hands claim mine.

"It's fine. You're okay," Sam's voice is soft, soothing. "I need to let go of you so I can pull you back into your body." The cold darkness is pooled all around me. I feel like my connection to Sam is the only thing keeping me from being pulled away. As if sensing my unease, Sam tightens his grip on my hands. "I'm not going to let anything happen to you. Trust me."

It takes a second to work up my will, but I nod. I feel regret when Sam's hands leave mine, leaving me alone in the pool of cold darkness trying to pull me away.

I jolt of electricity floods my senses, filling every nerve ending with pain. Light floods my vision as colors blur together. I gasp in air as I stare at the far wall of the training room. Every breath hurts.

A soothing hand rubs my back. "Breath. Just breathe," Sam orders calmly, "Deep and even. Sorry about the pain. It was the fastest way to pull you out."

"What was that?" I ask, turning to look at Sam.

Before Sam can respond the door flies open. When Neal's eyes land on me he breathes a sigh of relief. "Oh, thank goodness. I felt a big shift." Neal looks at Sam. Neither one of them speaks, but they seem to have a whole conversation. Neal just nods solemnly. "I'm going to go check the barrier."

"What was that?" I ask again.

"Uh, that was, um. . ." Neal seems to be struggling to find the words.

"Mors main concern," Sam's voice is grave. I look back at him. His face is dark. "Also, the reason he offered you the deal."

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"Sam, now is not the time," Neal's voice is somewhere between a plea and a warning.

Sam stands. "No, now is not the time." Sam offers me a hand, pulling me to my feet. "There are things that need to be seen to first, but she does need to know." Sam's hand comes to rest on my shoulder. "Man the shop for a bit. Neal and I will be back once we've checked the barrier."

His hand slides from my shoulder as he walks towards Neal. Was that it? "And then?" I blurt the question out.

Sam pauses, glancing back at me. He flashes me a reassuring smile. "Then you can study for your tests tomorrow." As if sensing my protest, he speaks again, "And then tomorrow, after you've passed your tests, we'll explain everything."