Don't run

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The hot sun wakes me in anger, I wanna keep sleeping. I close my eyes just to open them again at the sound of my alarm. "Uhh" I groan as I pull myself out of bed. I walk to my closet and pull out ,ripped jeans and a light blue striped shirt. I slowly walk to the bathroom only to get irritated. I gotta brush my teeth and take out my paci. But only I dont want to, cause i know once i do I'll no longer be small. I'll have to be big and deal with the world that's nothing like my safe place. It makes me sad and uncomfortable but I gotta so I do. I finish getting ready and run down the stairs of the pack house to the kitchen. Everyone seemed to be up already. "Layla I got your plate already ", I hear kaddy say sitting at the table. I go over and sit "thanks", we talked for over an hour about our dreams. You see for some wolves your dreams can help you find your mate. Well at least that's how it is for the Crimson Tide pack. It's not like I'm desperate to find mine or anything, I'm just a little worried. Soon bren and Josh show up carrying big plates . Bren has a plate full of meat and sweets. For some reason he believes that ,meat will make him the best beta one day. While Josh has a plate full of veggie every thing. You see he's a vegetarian, but you wouldn't know that from his big build.

"Hey little one" Josh says as he pet's my head, I lightly blush. Kaddy pushes me playfully to tease me. "Haha stupid ", I say as kaddy laughs hard and pinches my cheeks. She always does this even tho she's one herself she tease me about it. For awhile we just set there having small talk ,then we all started laughing and talking. My irritated mood soon fully goes away. I'm happy to have such great friends. After breakfast we walk to our morning classes. At this point me and kaddy separate from josh and bren. Not because we're girls and their boys. But because me and kaddy take "special" classes. When we arrive I take my seat at the top back of the class. I honestly don't wanna be here,all Ms. Das says is the same thing.

Soon class starts and I tune everything out because I know already. About how some wolves are "special " and need "special "care. How they faced trauma in, their life and find different ways to cope with it. Uhh please give me a break, we're just different and, their just trying to find different ways to fix us. But we don't need fixing at least not all of us. We just need love and understanding something they won't know about. "Layla", kaddy whispers to signal class is over. I grab my bag and start to walk out, only to be stopped my Ms. Das. "Layla I wanna talk to you about something ", what is it this time I wonder. "So your birthday's coming up, how you feeling?", I had a feeling that was it. I've been trying to pretend that I didn't have a birthday anymore. That it wasn't coming up in about a month,that I still had time. But I knew that eventually someone would ask.

"Uh how do I feel? I feel trapped and scared, I'm about to meet my soul mate. My anxiety and self doubt is off the charts right now!! I know that they say your mate will love you no matter what but its different. Especially with me and my secret. It's a lot and I just want to scream !".I let it out in the mind link between me and dawn my wolf. I really wanna say it all out loud but instead I just smile, and say "I'm fine ". After the day went smoothly and I finished my all my classes.

"Kaddy come run with us", in the mind link my friends call out. Without a second thought I go out to the running field. I go behind a tree, strip, then transform. Then start running until I find them. I feel so free out here running. I wish that I could just keep running and never look back. ~Bang~ bren tackles me as I'm lost in thought. He begins pawing at my ears playfully. "Ha your ass is done" I say pushing him off .We wrestle and run until we're worn out and the sun sets. Everyone goes back to find their clothes first, and walk back to the pack house. I take my time tho cause I wanna make this last. It feels good, the wind brushing threw my fur and the fresh smell of pine.

Quickly I speed up my pace because the feeling of being alone creeps in ,in a bad way. I walk to the pack house and go to see dad. I open the door to be welcomed with, the sent of strawberry and lemon. It's mom's sent, mom sits close next to dad as he does his paperwork. "Hey guy's just checking in", my mom smiles and gives me a thumbs up. Then I leave and slowly walk down to my room. I sometimes check on them. It's not like I'm really worried or anything, I just try and buy time. When I make it to my room I hesitate. I know once I go in I'm not gonna wanna come out. But really who cares, I open the door, close it behind me , and jump on the bed. I'm tired and sweaty, I just wanna sleep.I kick off my shoes and take a shower. When I hop out I slip into an, oversized sweater and my blue par of thigh highs.

I flop on the bed and slowly drift off under the fan. When I open my eyes I'm in a field. I can feel the grass underneath me, and feel the wind it's nice. But I know I'm dreaming tho, I get up and start running. Running and spinning, and rolling in the grass. I'm filled with this, crazy amount of energy and all I wanna do is keep moving . As I run I catch a glimps of white hair. I slowly come to a stop and back track. Theirs this person in the distance. Their tall with short white hair. I try getting a little closer but I still couldn't really see. I call out to them but they don't respond. Rude, this is my dream so why aren't they answering?.

"Maybe getting closer ", dawn says so I start running towards them. Ok if your not gonna answer then I'm gonna tackle you. As I get ready to tackle this person they turn around and I stop. Tears filled their honey du eyes, why?. Their brown skin although covered by pants and plain shirt. Is welcomed by the sun and the flowers, I hadn't noticed until now surround them. They're beautiful, yet pitiful. They look so sad. I get closer and take their hands in mine. Slowly rubbing circles around their back like mom used to do for me. "Shsh what's wrong?", I ask worried. They looked up at me but didn't answer. They only begin to cry hard, to which I don't know what to do. I try telling them everything is ok,but it does nothing. I get up and take a deep breath. "Ok I'll be back I'm gonna go get help ok", I begin to walk away. When I feel a hard tugging on my pants. "N-n-no please d-don't leave me alone ", they begin to beg. It surprised my ,why ? What's wrong? What's gonna happen if I leave them alone?.

Thoughts fill my head but I decide to pull away and start running. I need to get help for them. As I run I look back just to, check and see them slowly following after. Or at least trying, they fall over and over again. With tear filled eyes begging me to stop. Until they fall and dont get back up. I panic, what happened? I quickly run to them. Lifting them up to see scratches all over them. When did this happen they were fin a minute ago? I look at them and ask what happened but they don't speak. I start getting frustrated, "why won't they speak?,how am i supposed to help then?". "Think layla, think and breath", I try taking deep breaths. Doing what dawn said and realized how stupid I am.

I pull them in and hold them tight. I tell them that it's, gonna hurt and your gonna feel like your broken. But your not your just different and that's ok. Soon before I realize I'm crying along with them

~I'm so proud of this , it's my first time trying to merge two things in one, hopefully it turns out good:)~

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