All's Fair

All That Taz... and More?!

A/n:  Sorry I had to take this down the other day.  Part of it wasn't showing up, so I am breaking it up into two parts.

Barrage's office was full of military awards, plus his own desk with a chair for me and giant monitor. The only whimsical thing in the room was a wooden duck. I started to sit when- "Did! I! Tell you 'at ease', soldier?!" I straightened back up on my feet. Barrage sat down and once more looked over the papers he took from me.

"Everything appears to be in order." His eyes narrowed on 'appears' and he said the whole sentence like he was suspicious of me. "Background check, and in good standing." I'm here for public service, buddy, not military service! I bit back my thoughts. Even if they were how I really felt, they would only land me in trouble. Oh, well... when in Rome I guess.

"Permission to speak, Sir?" Barrage looked up from his desk.

"Granted." He said.

"I believe I may have... harmed your school mascot on my way in here. Sir, I thought that it was attacking me so-"

"YOU?" Barrage slammed both hands down on the desk. "You took down the Tazelwurm!? Hee-hee HAAA hahahahaha!" He was laughing so hard I'm surprised he didn't fall over on the floor. Then again if he did, could he get back up? "The most fear-ocious wild animal in the school got the pataters beat outta 'em by a LITTLE GIRL!"

He continued to laugh, until knock came from the door. Outside stood two tall figures in white, full-body suits! "Sir, who are they?" I asked.

"Oh, they're just our little ol' cleanin' staff. Wait outside soldier; I need to check somethin' with these men." I was all too happy to get out of there and sit outside. The second they were inside and the door was closed, I let out a frustrated sigh.

"This is crazy! If this is what the staff is like... oh, man do I want to see the students?" I probably already have a clue from that Chaz kid from earlier. My head fell into my hands as I groaned, "This is not fair."

I heard the door click, and in came that camera kid along with a girl sporting short black hair and black eyes, and... a microphone. Immediately, I covered my face with a flier next to me and pretended to read it. The girl didn't seem to notice me, and the camera guy failed to recognize me. She looked sweet, like a genuinely nice kid.

A jingle sounded off, and slightly familiar voice could be heard from the hallways. "Hi! I'm the Chaz! And today's super-hot big story, the one everyone is talking about is: Do I use bronzer or is this tan o'naturale?" He talked so fast I didn't have time to worry about him reporting about what he saw earlier. I looked up at the girl who had an annoyed expression on her face. "Yeah, that's what they want to know." She said with sarcasm. I think I like this one better. "They aren't all talking about the giant fence that's suddenly appeared!"

The fence is new? I had been focused more on the actual building when I came in, but now that I thought about it the big white fence did seem out of place around the school. The girl continued, her face looked more serious now, "Well, I'm Tina Kwee and I'm outside Barrage's office for some answers!"

Tina Kwee. Huh, she's the first sane person I've seen today. I didn't put down my flier in case I was recognized. But Barrage was loud enough for me to hear without the door being closed. "What do you mean you 'lost him'? If you don't get me that Taz, I'LL HAVE YOU BOTH TURNED INTO TOATERS!"

Turned into toasters? What?! Tina went into the room, and when the guy followed in after her I put down the paper and listened in. First, Tina demanded to know about the fence. She's got guts; I'll give her points for that. Barrage, surprisingly kind, said that the fence was to keep out the wolverines. When Tina pointed out that there weren't any wolverines around for miles, Barrage told her, "See? The fence is working already." I face-palmed. There's a hole in that logic you could drive truck through! Barrage began pushing Tina out, when he turned to the camera and said, "Any student... or studentzzz who bring me the school mascot get and automatic B!"