My Brother's Girl

30| The Other Four Letter Word

"What do you think of lilies? Or perhaps roses?" Lynette turned towards me. "What do you think, Amelia?"

I slurped the rest of my iced coffee through my straw. Or what remained of it. Which was just ice. My finger tapped the side of my cup. I was incredibly anxious today. I stopped taking the anxiety meds I was on since they caused side effects. When I called my doctor this morning, she agreed for me to switch. My next appointment was tomorrow. 

I had a really rough night last night. After Wyatt and I talked for awhile, he tried to get me to show him the dress I bought. I told him he just had to wait. We were both excited for the date. I had no idea if he was nervous. I was extremely nervous. I've been on a few dates with random guys before; but I was never really interested in them. With Wyatt—I was in love with him. Even more now then back in high school. And I was scared. Scared that he didn't feel the way I did. God, was history going to repeat itself? I hoped not. I don't think I would be able to take that again. 

"Amelia? You okay?" 

I turned to Lynette and my eyes widened a little. "Sorry." I looked at the flowers. "Lilies, definitely." 

She smiled happily. "That's what I was thinking!" She wrote something on a pad of paper. 

We've been wedding planning all day. I could barely look Lynette in the eye. She was so excited about this whole thing...

"Should we go register for gifts?"

I inwardly cringed. We've already been cake tasting, wine tasting, and now we selected flowers. I couldn't handle much more today. "Actually, Lynette, if you don't mind, I think I'll head home." I gave her a small smile and combed my hand through my hair. "Shopping takes a lot out of me." 

Lynette was as sweet as ever. She came up to me and placed her hands on my shoulders. "I don't mind, dear." She cupped the side of my face. "I know this is a lot for you. I appreciate you letting me help you plan the wedding. You're the only daughter I ever had and now...now you really will be my daughter." She wiped the tears in her eyes. "I'm just—so happy."

My chest tightened. Fuuuuuuuck. That's it, when I get home, I'm calling Logan and telling him that we needed to fix this. Now. I couldn't keep up this charade with his parents any longer. The longer it was going on, the more it would hurt them. And after everything they did for me, I couldn't let that happen.

Amelia, Wyatt & Lynette
Eight Years Ago

"Is she going to be okay, Mom?" Wyatt whispered the question to Lynette. 

I was sitting by the window in my bedroom. It was raining and I couldn't tear my eyes away from the droplets as they made streaks on the glass. Was this day happening? Was this real? It couldn't be...

"She will be," his mom whispered back, "eventually. It's going to take a lot of time, Wyatt." 

"What can we do for her?"  

I heard the worry in his voice. He was scared I was going to lose it. Truth was, I was pretty close. Losing both of my parents so suddenly in a car accident—I didn't know how I felt. Alone. Hopeless. Scared. What was I going to do? How was I going to make it through high school without my parents? Who was going to walk me down the aisle when I got married? Who was going to teach me to me a mother? 

Those questions have been going through my head over and over again since it happened. I haven't even cried yet. I felt like I couldn't. If I did, it would be real. Too real. If I started crying, I didn't know if I would ever stop.